- 1
Clifford T. Ward - It's a Nice Day
- 2
Clifford T. Ward - Gaye
- 3
Clifford T. Ward - Mr. Bilbo Baggins
- 4
Clifford T. Ward - Ocean Of Love
- 5
Clifford T. Ward - A Day To Myself
- 6
Clifford T. Ward - Always Think About You
- 7
Clifford T. Ward - Birmingham
- 8
Clifford T. Ward - Cricket
- 9
Clifford T. Ward - Evening
- 10
Clifford T. Ward - Everything Goes Out The Window
- 11
Clifford T. Ward - For Debbie And Her Friends
- 12
Clifford T. Ward - Got To Get Into Your Way Of Life
- 13
Clifford T. Ward - Messenger
- 14
Clifford T. Ward - New English Bible
- 15
Clifford T. Ward - Realisation
- 16
Clifford T. Ward - Snakes And Ladders
- 17
Clifford T. Ward - Taking The Long Way Round
- 18
Clifford T. Ward - The Way Of Love
- 19
Clifford T. Ward - Thinking About You
- 20
Clifford T. Ward - Tomorrow Night
- 21
Clifford T. Ward - Unmarried Mother
- 22
Clifford T. Ward - Wait a Minute You Fool
- 23
Clifford T. Ward - WayWard
- 24
Clifford T. Ward - We Could Be Talking
- 25
Clifford T. Ward - Who Cares
- 26
Clifford T. Ward - Yesterday In Parliament
- 27
Clifford T. Ward - You're No Angel
- 28
Clifford T. Ward - A Dream
- 29
Clifford T. Ward - A Sad Affair
- 30
Clifford T. Ward - A Sad Cliché
- 31
Clifford T. Ward - A Song For Susan
- 32
Clifford T. Ward - All Modern Conveniences
- 33
Clifford T. Ward - All That Glitters Is Not Gold
- 34
Clifford T. Ward - Another Radio Station
- 35
Clifford T. Ward - Antecipation
- 36
Clifford T. Ward - April
- 37
Clifford T. Ward - Are You Really Interested ?
- 38
Clifford T. Ward - Attraction
- 39
Clifford T. Ward - Avenue Dreams
- 40
Clifford T. Ward - Before The World Was Round
- 41
Clifford T. Ward - Both Of Us
- 42
Clifford T. Ward - Campers In The Night
- 43
Clifford T. Ward - Carrie
- 44
Clifford T. Ward - Cellophane
- 45
Clifford T. Ward - Change Of Heart
- 46
Clifford T. Ward - Circus Girl
- 47
Clifford T. Ward - Climate Of Her Favour
- 48
Clifford T. Ward - Coathanger
- 49
Clifford T. Ward - Cold Wind Blowing
- 50
Clifford T. Ward - Computer
- 51
Clifford T. Ward - Contrary
- 52
Clifford T. Ward - Convertible
- 53
Clifford T. Ward - Crisis
- 54
Clifford T. Ward - Detriment
- 55
Clifford T. Ward - Discernible
- 56
Clifford T. Ward - Easy, Baby
- 57
Clifford T. Ward - End Of Time Tonight
- 58
Clifford T. Ward - Escalator
- 59
Clifford T. Ward - Fast Sinking
- 60
Clifford T. Ward - For Emily
- 61
Clifford T. Ward - Gandalf
- 62
Clifford T. Ward - Gentle
- 63
Clifford T. Ward - Give Me One More Chance
- 64
Clifford T. Ward - God Help Me
- 65
Clifford T. Ward - Heaven
- 66
Clifford T. Ward - Heaven Lend a Hand
- 67
Clifford T. Ward - Here's Till Then
- 68
Clifford T. Ward - Home
- 69
Clifford T. Ward - Home Thoughts From Abroad
- 70
Clifford T. Ward - I Don't Understand Your Logic
- 71
Clifford T. Ward - I Got Lost Tonight
- 72
Clifford T. Ward - I'd Like To Take You Out Tonight
- 73
Clifford T. Ward - If I Had Known
- 74
Clifford T. Ward - It's Better To Believe
- 75
Clifford T. Ward - It's Such a Pity
- 76
Clifford T. Ward - Jackdaw
- 77
Clifford T. Ward - Jayne From Andromeda Spiral
- 78
Clifford T. Ward - Jenny
- 79
Clifford T. Ward - Jesus Of Long Ago
- 80
Clifford T. Ward - Jig-saw Girl
- 81
Clifford T. Ward - Julia
- 82
Clifford T. Ward - Lady With The Book In Her Hand
- 83
Clifford T. Ward - Last Train Tonight
- 84
Clifford T. Ward - Laugh It Off
- 85
Clifford T. Ward - Leader
- 86
Clifford T. Ward - Learning My Part
- 87
Clifford T. Ward - Leaving
- 88
Clifford T. Ward - Let's Be Fools Again
- 89
Clifford T. Ward - Like An Old Song
- 90
Clifford T. Ward - Losin' After All (nothin' New)
- 91
Clifford T. Ward - Lost Again
- 92
Clifford T. Ward - Lost In The Flow Of Your Love
- 93
Clifford T. Ward - Love In The Song
- 94
Clifford T. Ward - Lullaby
- 95
Clifford T. Ward - Mad About You
- 96
Clifford T. Ward - Marble Arch
- 97
Clifford T. Ward - Marron's Glance
- 98
Clifford T. Ward - Maybe I'm Right
- 99
Clifford T. Ward - Miner
- 100
Clifford T. Ward - Moonlight
- 101
Clifford T. Ward - My Goddess
- 102
Clifford T. Ward - My My What a Day
- 103
Clifford T. Ward - Naughty Boy
- 104
Clifford T. Ward - New England Days
- 105
Clifford T. Ward - Next To You
- 106
Clifford T. Ward - Nightingale
- 107
Clifford T. Ward - No More Rock 'n' Roll
- 108
Clifford T. Ward - Not To Mention Her Smile
- 109
Clifford T. Ward - Not Waving, Drowning
- 110
Clifford T. Ward - Nothing New
- 111
Clifford T. Ward - Prams
- 112
Clifford T. Ward - Quiz Show
- 113
Clifford T. Ward - Rayne
- 114
Clifford T. Ward - Reckless
- 115
Clifford T. Ward - Sal
- 116
Clifford T. Ward - Sam
- 117
Clifford T. Ward - Screen Test
- 118
Clifford T. Ward - Scullery
- 119
Clifford T. Ward - Secretary
- 120
Clifford T. Ward - Session Singer
- 121
Clifford T. Ward - Sidetracked
- 122
Clifford T. Ward - Some Uncertainty
- 123
Clifford T. Ward - Somebody Stole My Woman
- 124
Clifford T. Ward - Somehow
- 125
Clifford T. Ward - Someone I Know
- 126
Clifford T. Ward - Sometime Next Year
- 127
Clifford T. Ward - STAINS
- 128
Clifford T. Ward - Still Not Free
- 129
Clifford T. Ward - Summer Solstice
- 130
Clifford T. Ward - Sunshine Girl
- 131
Clifford T. Ward - Sweetness And Light
- 132
Clifford T. Ward - Sylvie
- 133
Clifford T. Ward - Sympathy
- 134
Clifford T. Ward - Tea Cosy
- 135
Clifford T. Ward - That's The Way Our Love Goes
- 136
Clifford T. Ward - The Best Is Yet To Come
- 137
Clifford T. Ward - The Cause Is Good
- 138
Clifford T. Ward - The Dancer
- 139
Clifford T. Ward - The Dubious Circus Company
- 140
Clifford T. Ward - The Gloria Bosom Show
- 141
Clifford T. Ward - The Mule
- 142
Clifford T. Ward - The Open University
- 143
Clifford T. Ward - The Session Singer
- 144
Clifford T. Ward - The Traveller
- 145
Clifford T. Ward - There's No Such Thing
- 146
Clifford T. Ward - They Must Think Me a Fool
- 147
Clifford T. Ward - Thinking Of Something To do
- 148
Clifford T. Ward - This Is The Stuff (stuck In The Lift)
- 149
Clifford T. Ward - This Was Our Love
- 150
Clifford T. Ward - Time The Magician
- 151
Clifford T. Ward - To An Air Hostess
- 152
Clifford T. Ward - Today In Parliament
- 153
Clifford T. Ward - Trespass
- 154
Clifford T. Ward - Trousers
- 155
Clifford T. Ward - Turbo
- 156
Clifford T. Ward - Twenty Minutes
- 157
Clifford T. Ward - Up In The World
- 158
Clifford T. Ward - User Friendly
- 159
Clifford T. Ward - Waiting For The Garda
- 160
Clifford T. Ward - Watchin' The Tv News
- 161
Clifford T. Ward - Water
- 162
Clifford T. Ward - Water-Wheel
- 163
Clifford T. Ward - Weather
- 164
Clifford T. Ward - When I Found You
- 165
Clifford T. Ward - Where do Angels Really Come From ?
- 166
Clifford T. Ward - Where Would That Leave Me?
- 167
Clifford T. Ward - Where's It Going To End?
- 168
Clifford T. Ward - Wherewithal
- 169
Clifford T. Ward - Witches And Ghosts
- 170
Clifford T. Ward - You Knock When You Should Come In
Quiz Show
Clifford T. Ward
I know you love the quiz shows
I know you love the quiz shows
I know you love the quiz shows.
And our final contestant tonight comes from . . .
Where was it again you said you come from?
An well, it doesn't mater
Let's make him welcome shall we folks?
Right, here we go -
A number of questions -
You provide the correct answers in the allotted time
And you win a lovely prize.
Are you ready?
Yep.
Who is the Prime Minister of England?
Ah, it's a woman. I know it's a woman. I think it's a woman.
Who replaced Terry Wogan on the radio?
Ah, that's a suave, slick Scotchman.
I wouldn't leave him alone with my missus, I know that.
In a sentence, what is the basis for modern thinking in society?
Star Trek is it? Oh I love the black doll in that show.
What does anaphobic mean?
Oh now, that's lucky: I learnt that this morning:
It's a hatred of -er- foreign women isn't it? Ooh, I can't understand that
I love women wherever they come from - they're all nice aren't they?
Who wears a blue uniform and is always there if you need help?
Mother Theresa?
What is a surrogate mother?
Ooh, that's my missus.
She ain't got two ha'pennies to rub together come Wednesday.
What is the role of the quiz show?
Cheese was it? No, no, I tell a lie. It was ham in mine.
I can only accept your first answer - sorry.
Who is the Queen of England?
Oh, it's a woman. I know it's a woman. I think it's a woman.
Who is the leader of the opposition?
Oh that's a woman for sure, it's my missus.
What's the meaning of the word 'horrendous'?
A bad woman is it?
What's the capital of Italy?
Oh I know that, it's -er- Nipples - I - I mean Naples.
Name the four counties in the United Kingdom.
This is easy - England, Scotland, Wales and London.
In a sentence, what do you know about the SDP Liberal Alliance?
Oh, is that the one my missus goes to where they do flower arranging
And -er- make wicker baskets and things?
Oh, there's some nice women there.
Who is Shirley Williams?
Oh, she goes there does she?
Oh yes, she's good at the flower arranging, so my missus tells me.
Who had a hit record with the song 'Wuthering Heights'?
Val Doonican is it? No, no, I know it's a woman though.
Who or what is Dow Jones?
A womaniser is he?
What does Danny La Rue do?
Oh, she dresses up as a man - is that right?
Well, you've done very well. Wendy, bring on the prizes.
Now which would you like to take home with you
The computer, the TV, the video or the holiday for two in Majorca?
Ooh, I'll have Wendy can I?
I've seen 'em do that on the Tele - you know,
The girl brings on the prizes,
And they say "I don't like the prizes, I'd rather have the girl".
Alright, you've won Wendy, off you go the pair of you.
Thank you for being a marvellous contestant.
Let's hear it for 'em, shall we?
Put you hands together and give them a big round warm of women -
I mean applause.
I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows
Don't you love the quiz shows?
I know you love the quiz shows
The BBC knows you love the quiz shows
And all the independents know you love the quiz shows
America taught us to love the quiz shows.
I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows
I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows
