- 1
Clifford T. Ward - Gaye
- 2
Clifford T. Ward - All That Glitters Is Not Gold
- 3
Clifford T. Ward - Jayne From Andromeda Spiral
- 4
Clifford T. Ward - Wherewithal
- 5
Clifford T. Ward - A Day To Myself
- 6
Clifford T. Ward - Always Think About You
- 7
Clifford T. Ward - Are You Really Interested ?
- 8
Clifford T. Ward - It's a Nice Day
- 9
Clifford T. Ward - Scullery
- 10
Clifford T. Ward - You're No Angel
- 11
Clifford T. Ward - A Dream
- 12
Clifford T. Ward - A Sad Affair
- 13
Clifford T. Ward - A Song For Susan
- 14
Clifford T. Ward - Antecipation
- 15
Clifford T. Ward - Give Me One More Chance
- 16
Clifford T. Ward - Nightingale
- 17
Clifford T. Ward - Sam
- 18
Clifford T. Ward - The Best Is Yet To Come
- 19
Clifford T. Ward - The Traveller
- 20
Clifford T. Ward - The Way Of Love
- 21
Clifford T. Ward - Tomorrow Night
- 22
Clifford T. Ward - Trousers
- 23
Clifford T. Ward - Witches And Ghosts
- 24
Clifford T. Ward - A Sad Cliché
- 25
Clifford T. Ward - All Modern Conveniences
- 26
Clifford T. Ward - Another Radio Station
- 27
Clifford T. Ward - April
- 28
Clifford T. Ward - Attraction
- 29
Clifford T. Ward - Avenue Dreams
- 30
Clifford T. Ward - Before The World Was Round
- 31
Clifford T. Ward - Birmingham
- 32
Clifford T. Ward - Both Of Us
- 33
Clifford T. Ward - Campers In The Night
- 34
Clifford T. Ward - Carrie
- 35
Clifford T. Ward - Cellophane
- 36
Clifford T. Ward - Change Of Heart
- 37
Clifford T. Ward - Circus Girl
- 38
Clifford T. Ward - Climate Of Her Favour
- 39
Clifford T. Ward - Coathanger
- 40
Clifford T. Ward - Cold Wind Blowing
- 41
Clifford T. Ward - Computer
- 42
Clifford T. Ward - Contrary
- 43
Clifford T. Ward - Convertible
- 44
Clifford T. Ward - Cricket
- 45
Clifford T. Ward - Crisis
- 46
Clifford T. Ward - Detriment
- 47
Clifford T. Ward - Discernible
- 48
Clifford T. Ward - Easy, Baby
- 49
Clifford T. Ward - End Of Time Tonight
- 50
Clifford T. Ward - Escalator
- 51
Clifford T. Ward - Evening
- 52
Clifford T. Ward - Everything Goes Out The Window
- 53
Clifford T. Ward - Fast Sinking
- 54
Clifford T. Ward - For Debbie And Her Friends
- 55
Clifford T. Ward - For Emily
- 56
Clifford T. Ward - Gandalf
- 57
Clifford T. Ward - Gentle
- 58
Clifford T. Ward - God Help Me
- 59
Clifford T. Ward - Got To Get Into Your Way Of Life
- 60
Clifford T. Ward - Heaven
- 61
Clifford T. Ward - Heaven Lend a Hand
- 62
Clifford T. Ward - Here's Till Then
- 63
Clifford T. Ward - Home
- 64
Clifford T. Ward - Home Thoughts From Abroad
- 65
Clifford T. Ward - I Don't Understand Your Logic
- 66
Clifford T. Ward - I Got Lost Tonight
- 67
Clifford T. Ward - I'd Like To Take You Out Tonight
- 68
Clifford T. Ward - If I Had Known
- 69
Clifford T. Ward - It's Better To Believe
- 70
Clifford T. Ward - It's Such a Pity
- 71
Clifford T. Ward - Jackdaw
- 72
Clifford T. Ward - Jenny
- 73
Clifford T. Ward - Jesus Of Long Ago
- 74
Clifford T. Ward - Jig-saw Girl
- 75
Clifford T. Ward - Julia
- 76
Clifford T. Ward - Lady With The Book In Her Hand
- 77
Clifford T. Ward - Last Train Tonight
- 78
Clifford T. Ward - Laugh It Off
- 79
Clifford T. Ward - Leader
- 80
Clifford T. Ward - Learning My Part
- 81
Clifford T. Ward - Leaving
- 82
Clifford T. Ward - Let's Be Fools Again
- 83
Clifford T. Ward - Like An Old Song
- 84
Clifford T. Ward - Losin' After All (nothin' New)
- 85
Clifford T. Ward - Lost Again
- 86
Clifford T. Ward - Lost In The Flow Of Your Love
- 87
Clifford T. Ward - Love In The Song
- 88
Clifford T. Ward - Lullaby
- 89
Clifford T. Ward - Mad About You
- 90
Clifford T. Ward - Marble Arch
- 91
Clifford T. Ward - Marron's Glance
- 92
Clifford T. Ward - Maybe I'm Right
- 93
Clifford T. Ward - Messenger
- 94
Clifford T. Ward - Miner
- 95
Clifford T. Ward - Moonlight
- 96
Clifford T. Ward - Mr. Bilbo Baggins
- 97
Clifford T. Ward - My Goddess
- 98
Clifford T. Ward - My My What a Day
- 99
Clifford T. Ward - Naughty Boy
- 100
Clifford T. Ward - New England Days
- 101
Clifford T. Ward - New English Bible
- 102
Clifford T. Ward - Next To You
- 103
Clifford T. Ward - No More Rock 'n' Roll
- 104
Clifford T. Ward - Not To Mention Her Smile
- 105
Clifford T. Ward - Not Waving, Drowning
- 106
Clifford T. Ward - Nothing New
- 107
Clifford T. Ward - Ocean Of Love
- 108
Clifford T. Ward - Prams
- 109
Clifford T. Ward - Quiz Show
- 110
Clifford T. Ward - Rayne
- 111
Clifford T. Ward - Realisation
- 112
Clifford T. Ward - Reckless
- 113
Clifford T. Ward - Sal
- 114
Clifford T. Ward - Screen Test
- 115
Clifford T. Ward - Secretary
- 116
Clifford T. Ward - Session Singer
- 117
Clifford T. Ward - Sidetracked
- 118
Clifford T. Ward - Snakes And Ladders
- 119
Clifford T. Ward - Some Uncertainty
- 120
Clifford T. Ward - Somebody Stole My Woman
- 121
Clifford T. Ward - Somehow
- 122
Clifford T. Ward - Someone I Know
- 123
Clifford T. Ward - Sometime Next Year
- 124
Clifford T. Ward - STAINS
- 125
Clifford T. Ward - Still Not Free
- 126
Clifford T. Ward - Summer Solstice
- 127
Clifford T. Ward - Sunshine Girl
- 128
Clifford T. Ward - Sweetness And Light
- 129
Clifford T. Ward - Sylvie
- 130
Clifford T. Ward - Sympathy
- 131
Clifford T. Ward - Taking The Long Way Round
- 132
Clifford T. Ward - Tea Cosy
- 133
Clifford T. Ward - That's The Way Our Love Goes
- 134
Clifford T. Ward - The Cause Is Good
- 135
Clifford T. Ward - The Dancer
- 136
Clifford T. Ward - The Dubious Circus Company
- 137
Clifford T. Ward - The Gloria Bosom Show
- 138
Clifford T. Ward - The Mule
- 139
Clifford T. Ward - The Open University
- 140
Clifford T. Ward - The Session Singer
- 141
Clifford T. Ward - There's No Such Thing
- 142
Clifford T. Ward - They Must Think Me a Fool
- 143
Clifford T. Ward - Thinking About You
- 144
Clifford T. Ward - Thinking Of Something To do
- 145
Clifford T. Ward - This Is The Stuff (stuck In The Lift)
- 146
Clifford T. Ward - This Was Our Love
- 147
Clifford T. Ward - Time The Magician
- 148
Clifford T. Ward - To An Air Hostess
- 149
Clifford T. Ward - Today In Parliament
- 150
Clifford T. Ward - Trespass
- 151
Clifford T. Ward - Turbo
- 152
Clifford T. Ward - Twenty Minutes
- 153
Clifford T. Ward - Unmarried Mother
- 154
Clifford T. Ward - Up In The World
- 155
Clifford T. Ward - User Friendly
- 156
Clifford T. Ward - Wait a Minute You Fool
- 157
Clifford T. Ward - Waiting For The Garda
- 158
Clifford T. Ward - Watchin' The Tv News
- 159
Clifford T. Ward - Water
- 160
Clifford T. Ward - Water-Wheel
- 161
Clifford T. Ward - WayWard
- 162
Clifford T. Ward - We Could Be Talking
- 163
Clifford T. Ward - Weather
- 164
Clifford T. Ward - When I Found You
- 165
Clifford T. Ward - Where do Angels Really Come From ?
- 166
Clifford T. Ward - Where Would That Leave Me?
- 167
Clifford T. Ward - Where's It Going To End?
- 168
Clifford T. Ward - Who Cares
- 169
Clifford T. Ward - Yesterday In Parliament
- 170
Clifford T. Ward - You Knock When You Should Come In
Quiz Show
Clifford T. Ward
I know you love the quiz shows
I know you love the quiz shows
I know you love the quiz shows.
And our final contestant tonight comes from . . .
Where was it again you said you come from?
An well, it doesn't mater
Let's make him welcome shall we folks?
Right, here we go -
A number of questions -
You provide the correct answers in the allotted time
And you win a lovely prize.
Are you ready?
Yep.
Who is the Prime Minister of England?
Ah, it's a woman. I know it's a woman. I think it's a woman.
Who replaced Terry Wogan on the radio?
Ah, that's a suave, slick Scotchman.
I wouldn't leave him alone with my missus, I know that.
In a sentence, what is the basis for modern thinking in society?
Star Trek is it? Oh I love the black doll in that show.
What does anaphobic mean?
Oh now, that's lucky: I learnt that this morning:
It's a hatred of -er- foreign women isn't it? Ooh, I can't understand that
I love women wherever they come from - they're all nice aren't they?
Who wears a blue uniform and is always there if you need help?
Mother Theresa?
What is a surrogate mother?
Ooh, that's my missus.
She ain't got two ha'pennies to rub together come Wednesday.
What is the role of the quiz show?
Cheese was it? No, no, I tell a lie. It was ham in mine.
I can only accept your first answer - sorry.
Who is the Queen of England?
Oh, it's a woman. I know it's a woman. I think it's a woman.
Who is the leader of the opposition?
Oh that's a woman for sure, it's my missus.
What's the meaning of the word 'horrendous'?
A bad woman is it?
What's the capital of Italy?
Oh I know that, it's -er- Nipples - I - I mean Naples.
Name the four counties in the United Kingdom.
This is easy - England, Scotland, Wales and London.
In a sentence, what do you know about the SDP Liberal Alliance?
Oh, is that the one my missus goes to where they do flower arranging
And -er- make wicker baskets and things?
Oh, there's some nice women there.
Who is Shirley Williams?
Oh, she goes there does she?
Oh yes, she's good at the flower arranging, so my missus tells me.
Who had a hit record with the song 'Wuthering Heights'?
Val Doonican is it? No, no, I know it's a woman though.
Who or what is Dow Jones?
A womaniser is he?
What does Danny La Rue do?
Oh, she dresses up as a man - is that right?
Well, you've done very well. Wendy, bring on the prizes.
Now which would you like to take home with you
The computer, the TV, the video or the holiday for two in Majorca?
Ooh, I'll have Wendy can I?
I've seen 'em do that on the Tele - you know,
The girl brings on the prizes,
And they say "I don't like the prizes, I'd rather have the girl".
Alright, you've won Wendy, off you go the pair of you.
Thank you for being a marvellous contestant.
Let's hear it for 'em, shall we?
Put you hands together and give them a big round warm of women -
I mean applause.
I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows
Don't you love the quiz shows?
I know you love the quiz shows
The BBC knows you love the quiz shows
And all the independents know you love the quiz shows
America taught us to love the quiz shows.
I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows
I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows
