My name is Alaska Thunderfuck
And I have something to say
I like black tea, I like black D
I never touched Tina, and that's the T
I know on What's the Tee?, I said that I don't drink
So you bitches probably don't even know what to think
When you see me in the club gettin' crunk
Acting stupid, getting drunk
I got a hundred problems, drinkin' ain't one
I tried to quit drinking but it's too much fun
I keep it cute and I act my age
And you're never ever gonna see me drunk on stage
It's a new dawn, it's a new age
Metallica, turn the page
Turn the page, turn the page
Chun Li, Streets of Rage
I smashed some pumpkins, rat in a cage
Let's pay women an equal wage
No seriously
What the fuck
Now lets talk about my exes
I cheated on Sharon with a guy in Texas
I'm just kidding he was really in Florida
But what the fuck fucking rhymes with Florida?
We were good together but we're better apart
And I learned a lot from that broken heart
Sharon and Chad, I'm happy for you
Cerrone the Cat I fucking miss you boo
Not every breakup turned out so well
I put a lot of really nice guys through some fucked up hell
But then there was this one guy, girl
And if you have Reddit, you probably know all about this already
Uh
This psycho ex got heavy handed
Tried to Death Star my whole fucking planet
Talkin' shit, droppin' names
Screen cappin', playin' games
I've had it, officially!
The bitch tried to really really come for me!
He crossed me like the River Styx
But the sex was good 'cause I like small dicks
(Ah ha!)
I'm not mad, I'm not pressed
The money's on the dresser, get dressed
To the twunk ass messes in the meet and greet
Tryna treat a Ru Girl like a piece of meat
Ow! You're pullin' my hair, bitch!
You're spillin' my dress bitch!
You think you're a fan, but you're only a mess, bitch!
Real fans? I fucking love you
I'd lay myself down on the train tracks for you
In fact, I made this fucking record for you
Call me Delano, 'cause I Adore you
Yeah, you, specifically
The AAA Girls went bankrupt morally
Willam met some models and serviced them orally
He's probably on his way to replace us quick
Just like he fucking did to Detox and Vic
Michelle always told me not to fuck with cliques
Michelle always told me not to fuck with cliques!
Oh, yeah, that reminds me about that thing
The secret I've been hiding like a ding-a-ling
I did some challenges, I won a few
Oh, yeah, that's a thing called All Stars 2
I can't blame you Adore
They went in really harsh that first day
And if it had been me in your position, who knows?
I might've done the same thing
I'm just lucky, I guess
I feel blessed, but I'm stressed
I wanna be the best, I just wanna be the best
A hundred thousand dollars, it ain't that much
To fuck up your mind and all your friends that you trust
I'm sorry Coco
I'm sorry Tatianna
I'm sorry Mom, I wanna smoke some marijuana
And move on, 'cause it's all just a game
And it is what it is at the end of the day
