1. 1

    Alex Turner - Stuck On The Puzzle

  2. 2

    Alex Turner - Piledriver Waltz

  3. 3

    Alex Turner - I Wanna Be Yours

  4. 4

    Alex Turner - Hiding Tonight

  5. 5

    Alex Turner - Glass In The Park

  6. 6

    Alex Turner - It's Hard To Get Around The Wind

  7. 7

    Alex Turner - 505

  8. 8

    Alex Turner - Stuck On The Puzzle (Intro)

  9. 9

    Alex Turner - Baby I'm Yours

  10. 10

    Alex Turner - R U Mine?

  11. 11

    Alex Turner - Fluorescent Adolescent

  12. 12

    Alex Turner - Only Ones Who Knows

  13. 13

    Alex Turner - You're So Dark

  14. 14

    Alex Turner - Snap Out Of It

  15. 15

    Alex Turner - Arabella

  16. 16

    Alex Turner - Fireside

  17. 17

    Alex Turner - The View From The Afternoon

  18. 18

    Alex Turner - Brianstorm

  19. 19

    Alex Turner - No. 1 Party Anthem

  20. 20

    Alex Turner - Cigarette Smoke

  21. 21

    Alex Turner - Cornerstone

  22. 22

    Alex Turner - Dance Little Liar

  23. 23

    Alex Turner - Do I Wanna Know?

  24. 24

    Alex Turner - Do Me a Favour

  25. 25

    Alex Turner - Feels Like We Only Go Backwards

  26. 26

    Alex Turner - Fire And The Thud

  27. 27

    Alex Turner - From The Ritz To The Rubble

  28. 28

    Alex Turner - I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor

  29. 29

    Alex Turner - Leave Before The Lights Come On

  30. 30

    Alex Turner - Love Is a Laserquest

  31. 31

    Alex Turner - My Propeller

  32. 32

    Alex Turner - No Buses

  33. 33

    Alex Turner - Potion Approaching

  34. 34

    Alex Turner - Still Take You Home

  35. 35

    Alex Turner - Strange

  36. 36

    Alex Turner - Suck It And See

  37. 37

    Alex Turner - The Jeweller's Hands

  38. 38

    Alex Turner - 2013

  39. 39

    Alex Turner - A Certain Romance

  40. 40

    Alex Turner - A Choice Of Three

  41. 41

    Alex Turner - All My Own Stunts

  42. 42

    Alex Turner - Bad Woman

  43. 43

    Alex Turner - Balaclava

  44. 44

    Alex Turner - Bigger Boys And Stolen Sweethearts

  45. 45

    Alex Turner - Black Treacle

  46. 46

    Alex Turner - Brick By Brick

  47. 47

    Alex Turner - Catapult

  48. 48

    Alex Turner - Choo Choo

  49. 49

    Alex Turner - Colour Of The Trap

  50. 50

    Alex Turner - Crying Lightning

  51. 51

    Alex Turner - D Is For Dangerous

  52. 52

    Alex Turner - Dancing Shoes

  53. 53

    Alex Turner - Dangerous Animals

  54. 54

    Alex Turner - Despair In The Departure Lounge

  55. 55

    Alex Turner - Diamonds Are Forever

  56. 56

    Alex Turner - Don't Sit Down 'Cause I've Moved Your Chair

  57. 57

    Alex Turner - Electricity

  58. 58

    Alex Turner - Evil Twin

  59. 59

    Alex Turner - Fake Tales Of San Francisco

  60. 60

    Alex Turner - Feel The Hyper Rhythm

  61. 61

    Alex Turner - Hold On, We're Going Home

  62. 62

    Alex Turner - I Want It All

  63. 63

    Alex Turner - If You Were There, Beware

  64. 64

    Alex Turner - Knee Socks

  65. 65

    Alex Turner - Library Pictures

  66. 66

    Alex Turner - Love Machine

  67. 67

    Alex Turner - Mardy Bum

  68. 68

    Alex Turner - Matador

  69. 69

    Alex Turner - Old Yellow Bricks

  70. 70

    Alex Turner - One For The Road

  71. 71

    Alex Turner - Only You Know

  72. 72

    Alex Turner - Perhaps Vampires Is a Bit Strong But...

  73. 73

    Alex Turner - Pretty Visitors

  74. 74

    Alex Turner - Reckless Serenade

  75. 75

    Alex Turner - Red Light Indicates Doors Are Secured

  76. 76

    Alex Turner - Red Right Hand

  77. 77

    Alex Turner - Scummy

  78. 78

    Alex Turner - Secret Door

  79. 79

    Alex Turner - She's Thunderstorms

  80. 80

    Alex Turner - Stop The World I Wanna Get Off With You

  81. 81

    Alex Turner - Teddy Picker

  82. 82

    Alex Turner - Temptation Greets You Like Your Naughty Friend

  83. 83

    Alex Turner - That's Where You're Wrong

  84. 84

    Alex Turner - The Bad Thing

  85. 85

    Alex Turner - The Bakery

  86. 86

    Alex Turner - The Hellcat Spangled Shalalala

  87. 87

    Alex Turner - The Lovers

  88. 88

    Alex Turner - This House Is a Circus

  89. 89

    Alex Turner - Too Much To Ask

  90. 90

    Alex Turner - What If You Were Right First Time?

  91. 91

    Alex Turner - When The Sun Goes Down

  92. 92

    Alex Turner - Who The Fuck Are Arctic Monkeys?

  93. 93

    Alex Turner - Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High?

  94. 94

    Alex Turner - You Know I'm No Good

  95. 95

    Alex Turner - You Probably Couldn't See For The Lights But You Were Staring Straight At Me

A Choice Of Three

Alex Turner

In the tunnel I noticed I had a choice of three. While I thought it very kind of them to offer me this, I do wonder if they realized what a dilemma they were sending to face me.
The trouble was, if I looked at your reflection in the left window I missed the actual image of you and your reflection in the right. And if I looked in the right I had the same problem but the other way around.
At first I thought I should probably settle on one of the mirrors as they were soon to disappear, but that idea quickly wilted, and my attention was drawn back to the center, occasionally checking on either side.
I must say I did question the authenticity of your nap a few minutes before. As the train left Loughborough I suspected it could've been a device to avoid conversation. I'd barely considered this for a moment, however, when a heavy breath and a gulping sound that I decided would be too embarrassing to fake led me to conclude that your nap wasn't fraudulent.
I found it difficult to concentrate on anything else as you slumped beneath your coat. Delighted that we'd waited until this hour to travel so the evening sun got its opportunity to skip across those sleeping cheeks, but unnerved by the prospect of being removed from the opposing chair to yours. I knew it was reserved but hoped that whoever had reserved it had fallen over.
It looked as if today I'd be safe. The train wasn't too busy but I did take a moment to recall the time when I was less fortunate.
I remmebered it with a chilling vivivity we were on the way to Brighton.
I knew it was going to be his seat as soon as I saw him on the platform, unzipping, checking, zipping, and rechecking things. Something about his face suggested that he had for years had a mustache and had not long since removed it. He wasn't going to think twice about disposing of me, especially considering then he'd get the chance to sit with you.
Though his hiking boot-march through the carriage was rather revolting, it wasn't this that made my hands tense up into sour claws of nausea. It was the way he said it.
"You're in my seat."
No "excuse me," no polite uncertainty, just the rigid, hideous fact. The thud with which it landed expelled all my preparation. Before I remembered my plans to pretend to be asleep, deaf, French, or only sat there because someone else was in my seat, I was walking to find another vacancy.
I ended up dwelling unhappily beside a girl with a boys bum. I knew that because she walked too far past when she returned to one of what I thought to be two empty seats when I sat myself there. I fidgeted until our reunion on the platform, where you brutally informed me "That man was really rather pleasant, actually."
Today I thought I'd better make sure that couldn't happen again and I pulled the ticket from the top of my seat. It took a few attempts and the facade of hanging a jacket to finally complete. I was terribly cautious. There's a threat of punishment for such deeds by fine as far as I understand, but those shackles were at the back of my mind as I crushed the reservation in my hidden fist. Folding and squeezing as if it were that beast on the way to the seaside.
Fortunately, there was no retribution. If anything the train got quieter as the journey continued.
And so in the tunnel, unable to decide, my head flicked through this trilogy of angles, angel after angle, until we were out the other side.
My frantic twitching no doubt caused the man at the adjacent table to narrow his eyes at the very least, I imagine.
I don't know for sure.
I didn't have time to add him to the cycle.

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