I manipulate, that is what I do
 
 I manipulate, that's what I'm doing to you
 
 That smirk on your face was designed by me
 
 I fucking curated it, like magically
 
 I manipulate, that is what I do
 
 I manipulate, that's what I'm doing to you
 
 You don't like what I've become?
 
 What did you expect to happen?
 
 You come around with your lips flapping
 
 All hopped up on diet gum
 
  
  And everything you say is supposed to make me come
 
 Like, I should feel grateful you are in my life
 
 But I'd rather dig out my own spleen with a butter knife
 
 Hey, I've got some Gaines-Burgers you can have if you want 'em
 
 You might as well, you've clearly hit rock bottom
 
 You probably hang out at Times Square with in your pocket
 
 And around your neck is your grandmother's locket
 
 With a picture inside of what you might have been
 
 Sound familiar? Do you even know where that cheese is made?
  
 
 It's from Iowa, you dullard
 
 Ever heard of it?
 
 I knew this guy from Ames, Ames, Iowa, Patrick
 
 He was so not to be into, in the most extreme way
 
 By the way, your bedside manner is reminiscent of a chuckle of hyenas Except
 
 Yes, it is a chuckle of hyenas, Dr. Turdface
 
 It's a collective noun
 
 Do you even know what a collective noun is, Stupidzilla?
 
 Hmm
 
 Let's see, I think your group would be called a misery
 
 Or, no, a patheticness of fuckwits
 
 Oh, oh right, pardon me, your doofusness, a patheticness of baristas
  
 
 I manipulate, that is what I do
 
 I manipulate, that's what I'm doing to you
 
 That smirk on your face was designed by me
 
 I fucking curated it, like magically
 
 I manipulate, that is what I do
 
 I manipulate, that's what I'm doing to you
 
 You know, being with you was like a cross between
 
 Cannibal Apocalypse and Lassie 9
 
 Except nowhere near as both of those movies were
 
 It's still a personal conundrum of mine
 
 How anyone can have such few of self awareness
 
 I manipulate, that is what I do
 
 I manipulate, that's why you just took a poo
 
 In those slacks you're wearing, is that a leisure suit?
 
 Did you make that yourself?
  
 
 That's a rhetorical question
 
 I manipulate, that is what I do
 
 I manipulate, it's rather easy with you
 
 You're sort of begging for it with your stupid face
 
 You're like Daffy Duck about to be erased
 
 Did you really think you could seduce me in a leisure suit?
 
 Well, I, yeah, okay, fair enough but that was like three weeks ago
 
 I'd like to see you try that now
  
 
 Uh, I'm not staring at your crotch, you maynard, I'm not!
 
 Well, it's hard not to, I mean, you practically dislocated your own hips thrusting it at me
 
 You're like that neon sign that keeps Kramer up all night
 
 Yeah, I guess you did keep me up all night a few times
  
 
 Really? 463? How could you know that?
 
 We only went out for a year
 
 What? I don't know, I was just gonna order out, I'm gonna
 
 Well, sure, I guess so
 
 Hey, um, I'm sorry I snapped at you a few minutes ago
 
 It's nothing personal, I hope you know that
 
 I manipulate, that is what I do
 
 I manipulate, that's what I'm doing to you
 
 That smirk on your face was designed by me
 
 I fucking curated it, like magically
 
 I manipulate, that is what I do
 
 I manipulate, that's what I'm doing to you