1. 1

    Jonathan Coulton - I Feel Fantastic

  2. 2

    Jonathan Coulton - Creepy Doll

  3. 3

    Jonathan Coulton - I'm Your Moon

  4. 4

    Jonathan Coulton - Drive

  5. 5

    Jonathan Coulton - Re:Your Brains

  6. 6

    Jonathan Coulton - The Future Soon

  7. 7

    Jonathan Coulton - Tom Cruise Crazy

  8. 8

    Jonathan Coulton - A Talk with George

  9. 9

    Jonathan Coulton - Always The Moon

  10. 10

    Jonathan Coulton - Baby Got Back

  11. 11

    Jonathan Coulton - Ball And Chain

  12. 12

    Jonathan Coulton - Better

  13. 13

    Jonathan Coulton - Betty And Me

  14. 14

    Jonathan Coulton - Big Bad World One

  15. 15

    Jonathan Coulton - Big Dick Farts A Polka

  16. 16

    Jonathan Coulton - Bills, Bills, Bills

  17. 17

    Jonathan Coulton - Blue Sunny Day

  18. 18

    Jonathan Coulton - Bozo's Lament

  19. 19

    Jonathan Coulton - Brand New Sucker

  20. 20

    Jonathan Coulton - Chiron Beta Prime

  21. 21

    Jonathan Coulton - Christmas Is Interesting

  22. 22

    Jonathan Coulton - Code Monkey

  23. 23

    Jonathan Coulton - Dance, Soterious Johnson, Dance

  24. 24

    Jonathan Coulton - De-Evolving

  25. 25

    Jonathan Coulton - Drinking With You

  26. 26

    Jonathan Coulton - Famous Blue Raincoat

  27. 27

    Jonathan Coulton - First Of May

  28. 28

    Jonathan Coulton - Flickr

  29. 29

    Jonathan Coulton - Furry Old Lobster

  30. 30

    Jonathan Coulton - I Crush Everything

  31. 31

    Jonathan Coulton - I Hate California

  32. 32

    Jonathan Coulton - I'm a Mason Now

  33. 33

    Jonathan Coulton - I'm Having A Party

  34. 34

    Jonathan Coulton - Ikea

  35. 35

    Jonathan Coulton - Just As Long As Me

  36. 36

    Jonathan Coulton - Kenesaw Mountain Landis

  37. 37

    Jonathan Coulton - Lady Aberlin's Muumuu

  38. 38

    Jonathan Coulton - Madelaine

  39. 39

    Jonathan Coulton - Make You Cry

  40. 40

    Jonathan Coulton - Mandelbrot Set

  41. 41

    Jonathan Coulton - Millionaire Girlfriend

  42. 42

    Jonathan Coulton - Mr. Fancy Pants

  43. 43

    Jonathan Coulton - My Beige Bear

  44. 44

    Jonathan Coulton - My Monkey

  45. 45

    Jonathan Coulton - Nemeses

  46. 46

    Jonathan Coulton - Not About You

  47. 47

    Jonathan Coulton - Octopus

  48. 48

    Jonathan Coulton - Over There

  49. 49

    Jonathan Coulton - Overhead

  50. 50

    Jonathan Coulton - Pizza Day

  51. 51

    Jonathan Coulton - Portal "Still Alive"

  52. 52

    Jonathan Coulton - Pull The String

  53. 53

    Jonathan Coulton - Rock And Roll Boy

  54. 54

    Jonathan Coulton - Seahorse

  55. 55

    Jonathan Coulton - Shop Vac

  56. 56

    Jonathan Coulton - Sibling Rivalry

  57. 57

    Jonathan Coulton - Skullcrusher Mountain

  58. 58

    Jonathan Coulton - Skymall

  59. 59

    Jonathan Coulton - Soft Rocked By Me

  60. 60

    Jonathan Coulton - Someone Is Crazy

  61. 61

    Jonathan Coulton - Space Doggity

  62. 62

    Jonathan Coulton - Still Alive

  63. 63

    Jonathan Coulton - Stroller Town

  64. 64

    Jonathan Coulton - Summer's Over

  65. 65

    Jonathan Coulton - That Spells DNA

  66. 66

    Jonathan Coulton - The Big Boom

  67. 67

    Jonathan Coulton - The Presidents

  68. 68

    Jonathan Coulton - The Town Crotch

  69. 69

    Jonathan Coulton - Till The Money Comes

  70. 70

    Jonathan Coulton - Todd The T1000

  71. 71

    Jonathan Coulton - Under The Pines

  72. 72

    Jonathan Coulton - W's Duty

  73. 73

    Jonathan Coulton - Want You Gone

  74. 74

    Jonathan Coulton - When I'm 25 Or 64

  75. 75

    Jonathan Coulton - When You Go

  76. 76

    Jonathan Coulton - Womb With A View

  77. 77

    Jonathan Coulton - You Ruined Everything

Baby Got Back

Jonathan Coulton

L.A. face with the Oakland booty

I like big butts and I cannot lie
You other brothers can't deny
When a girl walks in with an itty-bitty waist
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung, wanna pull up tough
You notice that butt was stuffed
Deep in the jeans she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring

Ooh babe, I wanna get wit'cha
And take your pretty picture
My homeboys tried to warn me
But that butt you got makes me so horny

Ooh, Rumplesmoothskin
You say you wanna get in my Benz?
Well, use me, use me
'Cause you ain't that average groupie
I've seen them dancin'
To hell with romancin'
She's sweat, wet,
Got it goin' like a turbo 'Vette

I'm tired of magazines
Sayin' flat butts are the thing
Take the average black man and ask him that
She gotta pack much back

So, fellas (yeah) fellas (yeah)
Has your girlfriend got the butt? (yeah)
Tell her to shake it, shake it
Shake that healthy butt

(L.A. face with the Oakland booty)
Baby got back
(Little in the middle)
Baby got back
(L.A. face with the Oakland booty)
Baby got back
(Little in the middle)
Baby got back

I like 'em round and big
And when I'm throwin' a gig
I just can't help myself, I'm actin' like an animal
Now here's my scandal
I wanna get you home
And whoa, double-up, whoa whoa
I ain't talkin' 'bout Playboy
'Cause silicone parts are made for toys

I want 'em real thick and juicy
So find that juicy double
Jonny C's in trouble
Beggin' for a piece of that bubble

So I'm lookin' at rock videos
Knock-kneed bimbos walkin' like hos
You can have them bimbos
I'll keep my women like Flo Jo

A word to the thick soul sisters, I wanna get with ya
I won't cuss or hit ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna
Till the break of dawn
Baby got it goin' on
A lot of simps won't like this song
'Cause them punks like to hit it and quit it
And I'd rather stay and play
'Cause I'm long, and I'm strong
And I'm down to get the friction on

So, ladies (yeah) ladies (yeah)
If you wanna roll in my Mercedes (yeah)
Then turn around, stick it out
Even white boys got to shout
Baby got back

(L.A. face with the Oakland booty)
Baby got back
(Little in the middle)
Baby got back
(L.A. face with the Oakland booty)
Baby got back
(Little in the middle)
Baby got back

(spoken)
Actually, when it comes to females,
Cosmo does not have very much to do at all with my selection.
I mean, 36-24-36?
Maybe if she's 5' 3"

So your girlfriend rolls a Honda,
Playin' workout tapes by Fonda
But Fonda ain't got a motor in the back of her Honda
My anaconda don't want none
Unless you have got buns, hon
You can do side bends or sit-ups,
But please don't lose that butt

Some brothers wanna play that "hard" role
And tell you that the butt ain't gold
So they toss it and they leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it

So Cosmo says you're fat
Well I ain't down with that
'Cause your waist is small and your curves are kickin'
And I'm thinkin' bout stickin'

To the beanpole dames in the magazines:
You ain't it, Miss Thing
Give me a sister, I can't resist her
Red beans and rice didn't miss her
Some knucklehead tried to dis
'Cause his girls are on my list
He had game but he chose to hit 'em
And I pull up quick to get wit 'em

So ladies (yeah) if the butt is round (yeah)
And you want a triple-X throw down
Dial 1-900-JONNYC
And kick them nasty thoughts

(L.A. face with the Oakland booty)
Baby got back
(Little in the middle)
Baby got back
(L.A. face with the Oakland booty)
Baby got back
(Little in the middle)
Baby got back

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