Play This At My Funeral (remix) (feat. Nino Paid)

Not now, not ever (JB made this)
(Julioo) alright

My mom was an addict and pop wasn't there (he wasn't)
Trust me, I still ain't care
My stepdad came in, showed me the ropes
And he died and it's messed up, ain't it? I know
I know how it feel when your house supposed to be a home (I know how it feel)
And you feel like it's nowhere to go
I know how it feel when you try your hardest all year (I know)
And you still got nothin' to show (trust me, I know)
I never thought I could be anybody but a nobody
God had to prove me wrong (had to)
I never thought I'd be able to jump on stage
And people would know my song (damn)
I spent twenty-two years in this world
And I'm hopin' I still got twenty-two more on the clock
My lil' sister is nineteen
Just had a baby that nobody told me about (nobody told)

My calls been goin' to voicemail, how I'ma call on you when you never can answer? (How I'ma call on you when you never can answer?)
As soon as my life goin' good, it seem like another person diagnosed with cancer
Nobody told me that kids like me, who grew up with ACEs, die way faster
So maybe I'm already cooked (uh-huh), it feel like my life a disaster (it feel like my life a disaster)
It feel like I'm cursed or trapped in a cycle of life where I never could win (I never could win)
I'm used to the hurt, I'm trapped in the cycle of pain where it never could end (never could end)
I've been on the other side, nobody told you the grass ain't green as it seem
I gotta go hard, the burdens of all my brothers been livin' through me (they livin' through me)
I do it for all my homies and most of the people who told me I couldn't (said that I couldn't)
I help anybody that I can, I know that they ain't do it for me and I shouldn't (and I shouldn't)
I'm showin' my dog a whole 'nother way to his life and it do feel good
As long as they smilin', I'm happy, they ask would I change, and I wouldn't

I never thought I could be anybody but a nobody
God had to prove me wrong (had to)
I never thought I'd be able to jump on stage
And people would know my song (damn)
I spent twenty-two years in this world
And I'm hopin' I still got twenty-two more on the clock
My lil' sister is nineteen
Just had a baby that nobody told me about (nobody told)

Off Addys, I'm trippin', I'm focusin' now
I'm tired of this way of livin', I wanna get out
It be the niggas who's broke, they ain't give me hand, be the main ones holdin' it out
I admit we was close, our relationship couldn't advance 'cause you never showed when it count
Said he was hurtin', they told him just be a man, so he put his 40 to his scalp
The burdens of all of my brothers been livin' through me, now I just made an M in my sleep
My mama won't help, and my brother been sent for a B, would you just go and visit at least?
I been hearin' the feds got a board with a picture of me, told lil' bro, Ain't no killin' this week
Had to learn how to talk the language criminals speak with this shit till we stiff for the streets
They thought I'd be dead 'cause where I was left at
You don't wanna be ahead on the death track
Now I know all of my challenges tough, when it's easy to people, don't ever respect that
Just when I think I'm progressin', here come a new problem that's causing a set back
Tryna turn all my losses to lessons, I hope I'm evolvin' enough for my next match

My mom was an addict and pop wasn't there (my mom was an addict and what?)
Trust me, I still ain't care (I did)
My stepdad came in, showed me the ropes (my stepdad came in)
And he died and it's messed up, ain't it? I know (it's messed up, ain't it?)
I know how it feel when your house supposed to be a home (I know how it feel)
And you feel like it's nowhere to go (it's nowhere to go)
I know how it feel when you try your hardest all year
And you still got nothin' to show (still got nothin' to show)
I never thought I could be anybody but a nobody
God had to prove me wrong
I never thought I'd be able to jump on stage
And people would know my song
I spent twenty-two years in this world
And I'm hopin' I still got twenty-two more on the clock
My lil' sister is nineteen
Just had a baby that nobody told me about (nobody told about me about)