It was on the good ship Venus 
 By Christ, ya shoulda seen us 
 The figurehead was a whore in bed 
 And the mast, a mammoth penis 
    The captain of this lugger 
 He was a dirty bugger 
 He wasn't fit to shovel shit 
 From one place to another   
 Friggin' in the riggin' 
 Friggin' in the riggin' 
 Friggin' in the riggin' 
 There was fuck all else to do   
 The first mate's name was Morgan 
 By Christ, he was a gorgon 
 Ten times a day he'd stop and play 
 With his fuckin' organ   
 The first mate's name was Cooper 
 By Christ he was a trooper. 
 He jerked and jerked until he worked 
 Himself into a stupor   
 Friggin' in the riggin' 
 Friggin' in the riggin' 
 Friggin' in the riggin' 
 There was fuck all else to do   
 The second mate was Andy 
 By Christ, he had a dandy 
 Till they crushed his cock on a jagged rock 
 For cumming in the brandy   
 The cabin boy was Flipper 
 He was a fuckin' nipper 
 He stuffed his ass with broken glass 
 And circumcised the skipper   
 Friggin' in the riggin' 
 Friggin' in the riggin' 
 Friggin' in the riggin' 
 There was fuck all else to do   
 The Captain's wife was Mabel 
 To fuck she was not able 
 So the dirty shits, they nailed her tits 
 Across the barroom table   
 The Captain had a daughter 
 Who fell in deep sea water 
 And by her squeals we knew the eels 
 Had found 'er sexual quarters   
 Friggin' in the riggin' 
 Friggin' in the riggin' 
 Friggin' in the riggin' 
 There was fuck all else to do