Merry Muthafuckin X Mas

[Uncle Dolamite]
Come on over hunnie
And give your uncle Dolamite a kiss
Well what you want baby?

[Baby]
Would you tell me a story?

[Uncle Dolamite]
You want me to tell you a story?

[Baby]
Hell yeah!

[Other baby]
Me too!

[Uncle Dolamite]
Yes hunnie I'm a tell you a story
About the bad ass Eazy E
He was drinkin' whisky and gin at the age of three
Listen and listen well
He's a bad muthafu'

[Mother]
Gimmie that God damn book!
Here let me read you this one
Chrismas in Compton
It was a silent night, yes a holy night
Until Mr. Claus turned into santa muthafuckin' right?

[Carolers]
Deck the halls with balls of holy
Fa la la la la la la la la
Tis the season to be jolly

[Eazy-E]
Merry Chrismas muthafucka!

Merry muthafuckin' Chrismas and a ho ho ho!
While I'm ridin' that cot under the missle toe
Now dashin' through the snow
In a candy right top 6-4
Over the hills I go
Laughin' at this hoe
Nuts on rich and rings
Makin' me feel right
Oh what fun it is to know
That I'm gonna get this pussy tonight
So ring them bells, ring them bells
Shes takin' it all the way
Oh what fun it is to watch her suck my dick this way
Hey ring them bells, ring them bells
Shes takin' it all the way
Oh what fun it is to nut, while she's suckin' my dick
Oh yay!
Tis the season to get busy
Compton crime lick
And I'm smokin' on this stick

[Santa]
Ho ho ho come sit on my face
I'm mean lap and tell me what you want for Chrismas
Ho ho

[Menajahtwa]
I want a slay ride
A CD player
A fifty rum
She said slide down the chimney and I'm gonna cum
A VCR on the set with no but porno flicks
Rudolph the red nose reindeer
Like a everlastin' gobstoper
Give me a? For his cock you'll be the party poppa
I dig a ho
Crack a dough
By the north pole
I wanna be havin a? Time fuckin' in tha snow
I made him drop to his knees
Yeah you know what's up
I said heres some candy canes eat'em up
Id drop em down swinging on my toes
Send me some cheese, I love the candy cream give me loot
Send me a little Jack horny guy
Yeah so fall on the hunt, bonapatite
With a condom in a tree

All I want for Chrismas is my two front teeth
My two front teeth, my two front teeth
All I want for Chrismas is my two front teeth
Yo where's ya rhyme tell me buck wheat

[Buck wheat]
Buck wheat is a waskal
That's no Chrismas
And all the toys, boys and girls
Fuck ya wishes
I'm not happy, over joy in this muthafucka
No indo under my tree so Santa be a sucka
No shit on the roof, cough the rudolph's nuts
When I was young I was the only kid
Who had enough guts to be
Good ole hearin' on the East
I'd stay awake just to let America know
That santa was a fake
I used to believe in Saint Dick when Elvis was alive
But all the fuckin' bullshit got played when I was five
Years old just stay young, bold datin'
Singin' Silent Night carolin' recietin'
Now all I want for chrismas is my indo wreath
I got my two front teeth
Uncle Eazy be the TZ
Just spread me a leaf
Little kids don't cry
When you find out the Santa Claus is just a fuckin' lie

[Eazy-E]
On the third day of Chrismas my homeboys gave to me
Three pounds of indo
Two birds of cocaine
And a A muthafuckin' K bitch

Eazy-E oh eazy-E
Show us how you treat those bitches
I saw mommy fuckin' Eazy Claus

[Eazy-e]
Close the door little bitch
I'm gettin' these draws

I'm a tell my daddy if ya ass don't stop

[Eazy-E]
I don't give a fuck
I'm gettin' chrismas caught
Ho ho ho and away I go

Oh Saint Nick got a dick like a pole
Well where's our shit? This muthafucka's cheap!

[Eazy-E]
Shut the fuck up bitches
And go back to sleep

Yo black what you want for Christmas?
Yo black I want a job
For my Christmas is corn on the cob
But a nigga will eat them chicken, and
Chitlens, watermelon, corn bread and some froot loops
Whos climbin' in my window
Smokin' up indo
My carin' and high make a high know
Both, get off my fucking yard with your camel
You walk and get, busy and santa like that-
(Nonsense) I'm on a rhymer
I'm tell that the FN clan will make in the shit slam
Its Christmas time
The simple simon Christmas make me jam jam jam

Yo black what you want for Christmas?
Yo black I want some cash
So I can buy some indo, chronic and some hash
Yo here comes the atban klan rough and rugged

A rump pa pump pump
A rump pa pump pump

[Everyone]
Merry muthafuckin' Chrismas
Merry muthafuckin' Chrismas
Merry muthafuckin' Chrismas
And have a fucked up new year

[Eazy-E]
You bitch!

[Mother]
And they all went to prison
And lived fucked up lives ever after
The end