I came back through the winter
With my cold hands at your door
Boots full of water, couldn't run anymore
I had ash on my shoulders from the bridges that I burned
But I still kept your whisper in the places that I turn
You said: Child, when the night gets cruel
Don't you dare forget you're more than all you've used
So I carried that sentence like a coal in the dark
Hid it under all the shame that wrapped around my heart
Oh, if I fall again, will you lift my head?
If I go numb, will you call me back from the dead?
Mama, don't close your eyes
I'm still here, I'm still alive
I came through the snow with a shattered soul
But I'm holding on to every word you told
Mama, don't turn away, I found my knees
I learned to pray with these cold, cold hands and this broken core
I'm just asking: Can I come back home once more?
You remember the kitchen
With the candle on the plate?
You'd sing over dishes when it all felt late
Let the storm keep shouting, let the fear run wild
We were made for the fire, we were made, my child
I took that little chorus to the cities and the bars
To the empty alleys and the backseat cars
But your hymn kept knocking when the windows froze
I said: Stand up, girl, you're not what they chose
Oh, if I break again, will you hold my name?
If I lose my way, will you light that flame?
Mama, don't close your eyes
I'm still here, I'm still alive
I came through the snow with a shattered soul
But I'm holding on to every word you told
Mama, don't turn away, I found my knees
I learned to pray with these cold, cold hands and this broken core
I'm just asking: Can I come back home once more?
I laid my fear on the chapel floor
Whispered every secret that I carried before
Said: If there's a God in this frozen town
Let me feel one hand when I'm falling down
And I swear I heard you in the echo of the choir
Your old voice rising like a small clean fire, singing hallelujah
I still choose you, even with the cracks, I see right through
Mama, don't close your eyes (don't close your eyes)
(I'm still alive) from the far like a wind to your wooden floor
I was lost so long, but I'm at your door
Mama, don't turn away if you can't forgive
Just let me stay with these cold, cold hands and this trembling heart
Let me start again where you always start
