Chris Farley Tribute

The first time I saw him
He was sweeter than shit
Plaid jacket and belt too tight
He wasn't even doing a bit

Then he cartwheeled around the room
And slow danced with the cleaning lady
He was a one man party
You know who I'm talking about
I'm talking about my friend Chris Farley

On a Saturday night my man
Would always deliver
Whether he was the bumblebee girl
Or living in a van down by the river

He loved the Bears and did the dance
At Chippendales with Swayze
When they replaced his coffee with Folgers
He went fuckin' crazy

The sexiest gap girl
And Meatloaf in the band
Without him there'd be no lunch lady
In lunch lady land
Oh, you know who I'm thinking about
I'm thinking about my boy Chris Farley

After a show he'd drink a quarter Jack Daniels
And stick the bottle right up his ass
But, hangover as hell
That catholic boy
Always show up to morning mass

We tell him: Slow down, you'll end up like Belushi and Candy
He said: Those guys are my heroes, that's all fine and dandy
I ain't making that shit up
That's the truth about my boy Chris Farley

I saw him in the office crying with his headphones on
Listening to a KC And The Sunshine Band song
I said: Buddy, how the hell is that making you so sad
Then he laughed and said: Just thinkin' about my dad

The last big hang we had was at Timmy Meadows's wedding party
We laughed our balls off all nightlong, all because of Farley
But a few months later the party came to an end
We flew out to Madison to bury our friend
Nothing was harder than saying goodbye
Except watching Chris's father have his turn to cry

Hey buddy, life's moved on but you still bring us so much joy
Make my kids laugh with your YouTube clips or Tommy Boy
And when they ask me who's the funniest guy I ever knew
I tell them hands down without a doubt it's you
Yeah, I miss hanging out watching you trying to get laid
But most of all I miss watching you fuck with Spade
Well, it ended like you wanted but I wish you were still here with me
And we would get on a plain to go shoot
Grown Ups 3

Yeah, life ain't the same without you boy
And that's why I'm singing about
I'm singing about my friend Chris Farley

And if you make enough noise
Maybe he'll hear us
Give it up for the great
Chris Farley