I took you in and I watched you grow
I taught you everything you know
I took you everywhere
We were the perfect pair
I played every game you played
Cleaned up after the mess you made
I showed you right from wrong
But I told you all along
You may be man's best friend
But if you're bad, I'm gonna send you
To the school for dogs
When I took you on holiday
I stopped the car and you ran away
I should have understood
Your breeding's not so good
Running my fingers through your hair
I find all kinds of things in there
I made you what you are
But this has gone too far
You may be man's best friend
But if you're bad, I'm gonna send you
To the school for dogs
I made you your favorite foods
Put up with your changing moods
All your respect has gone
And this cannot go on
Don't look at me with those big brown eyes
You know I love you, but you dogmatize
Don't say you didn't know
I warned you long ago
You may be man's best friend
But if you're bad, I'm gonna send you
To the school for dogs
You may be man's best friend
But if you're bad, I'm gonna send you
To the school for dogs
