- 1
Clifford T. Ward - Gaye
- 2
Clifford T. Ward - Wherewithal
- 3
Clifford T. Ward - Always Think About You
- 4
Clifford T. Ward - Cricket
- 5
Clifford T. Ward - Mr. Bilbo Baggins
- 6
Clifford T. Ward - Rayne
- 7
Clifford T. Ward - The Traveller
- 8
Clifford T. Ward - Time The Magician
- 9
Clifford T. Ward - You Knock When You Should Come In
- 10
Clifford T. Ward - A Day To Myself
- 11
Clifford T. Ward - A Dream
- 12
Clifford T. Ward - A Sad Affair
- 13
Clifford T. Ward - A Sad Cliché
- 14
Clifford T. Ward - A Song For Susan
- 15
Clifford T. Ward - All Modern Conveniences
- 16
Clifford T. Ward - All That Glitters Is Not Gold
- 17
Clifford T. Ward - Another Radio Station
- 18
Clifford T. Ward - Antecipation
- 19
Clifford T. Ward - April
- 20
Clifford T. Ward - Are You Really Interested ?
- 21
Clifford T. Ward - Attraction
- 22
Clifford T. Ward - Avenue Dreams
- 23
Clifford T. Ward - Before The World Was Round
- 24
Clifford T. Ward - Birmingham
- 25
Clifford T. Ward - Both Of Us
- 26
Clifford T. Ward - Campers In The Night
- 27
Clifford T. Ward - Carrie
- 28
Clifford T. Ward - Cellophane
- 29
Clifford T. Ward - Change Of Heart
- 30
Clifford T. Ward - Circus Girl
- 31
Clifford T. Ward - Climate Of Her Favour
- 32
Clifford T. Ward - Coathanger
- 33
Clifford T. Ward - Cold Wind Blowing
- 34
Clifford T. Ward - Computer
- 35
Clifford T. Ward - Contrary
- 36
Clifford T. Ward - Convertible
- 37
Clifford T. Ward - Crisis
- 38
Clifford T. Ward - Detriment
- 39
Clifford T. Ward - Discernible
- 40
Clifford T. Ward - Easy, Baby
- 41
Clifford T. Ward - End Of Time Tonight
- 42
Clifford T. Ward - Escalator
- 43
Clifford T. Ward - Evening
- 44
Clifford T. Ward - Everything Goes Out The Window
- 45
Clifford T. Ward - Fast Sinking
- 46
Clifford T. Ward - For Debbie And Her Friends
- 47
Clifford T. Ward - For Emily
- 48
Clifford T. Ward - Gandalf
- 49
Clifford T. Ward - Gentle
- 50
Clifford T. Ward - Give Me One More Chance
- 51
Clifford T. Ward - God Help Me
- 52
Clifford T. Ward - Got To Get Into Your Way Of Life
- 53
Clifford T. Ward - Heaven
- 54
Clifford T. Ward - Heaven Lend a Hand
- 55
Clifford T. Ward - Here's Till Then
- 56
Clifford T. Ward - Home
- 57
Clifford T. Ward - Home Thoughts From Abroad
- 58
Clifford T. Ward - I Don't Understand Your Logic
- 59
Clifford T. Ward - I Got Lost Tonight
- 60
Clifford T. Ward - I'd Like To Take You Out Tonight
- 61
Clifford T. Ward - If I Had Known
- 62
Clifford T. Ward - It's a Nice Day
- 63
Clifford T. Ward - It's Better To Believe
- 64
Clifford T. Ward - It's Such a Pity
- 65
Clifford T. Ward - Jackdaw
- 66
Clifford T. Ward - Jayne From Andromeda Spiral
- 67
Clifford T. Ward - Jenny
- 68
Clifford T. Ward - Jesus Of Long Ago
- 69
Clifford T. Ward - Jig-saw Girl
- 70
Clifford T. Ward - Julia
- 71
Clifford T. Ward - Lady With The Book In Her Hand
- 72
Clifford T. Ward - Last Train Tonight
- 73
Clifford T. Ward - Laugh It Off
- 74
Clifford T. Ward - Leader
- 75
Clifford T. Ward - Learning My Part
- 76
Clifford T. Ward - Leaving
- 77
Clifford T. Ward - Let's Be Fools Again
- 78
Clifford T. Ward - Like An Old Song
- 79
Clifford T. Ward - Losin' After All (nothin' New)
- 80
Clifford T. Ward - Lost Again
- 81
Clifford T. Ward - Lost In The Flow Of Your Love
- 82
Clifford T. Ward - Love In The Song
- 83
Clifford T. Ward - Lullaby
- 84
Clifford T. Ward - Mad About You
- 85
Clifford T. Ward - Marble Arch
- 86
Clifford T. Ward - Marron's Glance
- 87
Clifford T. Ward - Maybe I'm Right
- 88
Clifford T. Ward - Messenger
- 89
Clifford T. Ward - Miner
- 90
Clifford T. Ward - Moonlight
- 91
Clifford T. Ward - My Goddess
- 92
Clifford T. Ward - My My What a Day
- 93
Clifford T. Ward - Naughty Boy
- 94
Clifford T. Ward - New England Days
- 95
Clifford T. Ward - New English Bible
- 96
Clifford T. Ward - Next To You
- 97
Clifford T. Ward - Nightingale
- 98
Clifford T. Ward - No More Rock 'n' Roll
- 99
Clifford T. Ward - Not To Mention Her Smile
- 100
Clifford T. Ward - Not Waving, Drowning
- 101
Clifford T. Ward - Nothing New
- 102
Clifford T. Ward - Ocean Of Love
- 103
Clifford T. Ward - Prams
- 104
Clifford T. Ward - Quiz Show
- 105
Clifford T. Ward - Realisation
- 106
Clifford T. Ward - Reckless
- 107
Clifford T. Ward - Sal
- 108
Clifford T. Ward - Sam
- 109
Clifford T. Ward - Screen Test
- 110
Clifford T. Ward - Scullery
- 111
Clifford T. Ward - Secretary
- 112
Clifford T. Ward - Session Singer
- 113
Clifford T. Ward - Sidetracked
- 114
Clifford T. Ward - Snakes And Ladders
- 115
Clifford T. Ward - Some Uncertainty
- 116
Clifford T. Ward - Somebody Stole My Woman
- 117
Clifford T. Ward - Somehow
- 118
Clifford T. Ward - Someone I Know
- 119
Clifford T. Ward - Sometime Next Year
- 120
Clifford T. Ward - STAINS
- 121
Clifford T. Ward - Still Not Free
- 122
Clifford T. Ward - Summer Solstice
- 123
Clifford T. Ward - Sunshine Girl
- 124
Clifford T. Ward - Sweetness And Light
- 125
Clifford T. Ward - Sylvie
- 126
Clifford T. Ward - Sympathy
- 127
Clifford T. Ward - Taking The Long Way Round
- 128
Clifford T. Ward - Tea Cosy
- 129
Clifford T. Ward - That's The Way Our Love Goes
- 130
Clifford T. Ward - The Best Is Yet To Come
- 131
Clifford T. Ward - The Cause Is Good
- 132
Clifford T. Ward - The Dancer
- 133
Clifford T. Ward - The Dubious Circus Company
- 134
Clifford T. Ward - The Gloria Bosom Show
- 135
Clifford T. Ward - The Mule
- 136
Clifford T. Ward - The Open University
- 137
Clifford T. Ward - The Session Singer
- 138
Clifford T. Ward - The Way Of Love
- 139
Clifford T. Ward - There's No Such Thing
- 140
Clifford T. Ward - They Must Think Me a Fool
- 141
Clifford T. Ward - Thinking About You
- 142
Clifford T. Ward - Thinking Of Something To do
- 143
Clifford T. Ward - This Is The Stuff (stuck In The Lift)
- 144
Clifford T. Ward - This Was Our Love
- 145
Clifford T. Ward - To An Air Hostess
- 146
Clifford T. Ward - Today In Parliament
- 147
Clifford T. Ward - Tomorrow Night
- 148
Clifford T. Ward - Trespass
- 149
Clifford T. Ward - Trousers
- 150
Clifford T. Ward - Turbo
- 151
Clifford T. Ward - Twenty Minutes
- 152
Clifford T. Ward - Unmarried Mother
- 153
Clifford T. Ward - Up In The World
- 154
Clifford T. Ward - User Friendly
- 155
Clifford T. Ward - Wait a Minute You Fool
- 156
Clifford T. Ward - Waiting For The Garda
- 157
Clifford T. Ward - Watchin' The Tv News
- 158
Clifford T. Ward - Water
- 159
Clifford T. Ward - Water-Wheel
- 160
Clifford T. Ward - WayWard
- 161
Clifford T. Ward - We Could Be Talking
- 162
Clifford T. Ward - Weather
- 163
Clifford T. Ward - When I Found You
- 164
Clifford T. Ward - Where do Angels Really Come From ?
- 165
Clifford T. Ward - Where Would That Leave Me?
- 166
Clifford T. Ward - Where's It Going To End?
- 167
Clifford T. Ward - Who Cares
- 168
Clifford T. Ward - Witches And Ghosts
- 169
Clifford T. Ward - Yesterday In Parliament
- 170
Clifford T. Ward - You're No Angel
Quiz Show
Clifford T. Ward
I know you love the quiz shows
I know you love the quiz shows
I know you love the quiz shows.
And our final contestant tonight comes from . . .
Where was it again you said you come from?
An well, it doesn't mater
Let's make him welcome shall we folks?
Right, here we go -
A number of questions -
You provide the correct answers in the allotted time
And you win a lovely prize.
Are you ready?
Yep.
Who is the Prime Minister of England?
Ah, it's a woman. I know it's a woman. I think it's a woman.
Who replaced Terry Wogan on the radio?
Ah, that's a suave, slick Scotchman.
I wouldn't leave him alone with my missus, I know that.
In a sentence, what is the basis for modern thinking in society?
Star Trek is it? Oh I love the black doll in that show.
What does anaphobic mean?
Oh now, that's lucky: I learnt that this morning:
It's a hatred of -er- foreign women isn't it? Ooh, I can't understand that
I love women wherever they come from - they're all nice aren't they?
Who wears a blue uniform and is always there if you need help?
Mother Theresa?
What is a surrogate mother?
Ooh, that's my missus.
She ain't got two ha'pennies to rub together come Wednesday.
What is the role of the quiz show?
Cheese was it? No, no, I tell a lie. It was ham in mine.
I can only accept your first answer - sorry.
Who is the Queen of England?
Oh, it's a woman. I know it's a woman. I think it's a woman.
Who is the leader of the opposition?
Oh that's a woman for sure, it's my missus.
What's the meaning of the word 'horrendous'?
A bad woman is it?
What's the capital of Italy?
Oh I know that, it's -er- Nipples - I - I mean Naples.
Name the four counties in the United Kingdom.
This is easy - England, Scotland, Wales and London.
In a sentence, what do you know about the SDP Liberal Alliance?
Oh, is that the one my missus goes to where they do flower arranging
And -er- make wicker baskets and things?
Oh, there's some nice women there.
Who is Shirley Williams?
Oh, she goes there does she?
Oh yes, she's good at the flower arranging, so my missus tells me.
Who had a hit record with the song 'Wuthering Heights'?
Val Doonican is it? No, no, I know it's a woman though.
Who or what is Dow Jones?
A womaniser is he?
What does Danny La Rue do?
Oh, she dresses up as a man - is that right?
Well, you've done very well. Wendy, bring on the prizes.
Now which would you like to take home with you
The computer, the TV, the video or the holiday for two in Majorca?
Ooh, I'll have Wendy can I?
I've seen 'em do that on the Tele - you know,
The girl brings on the prizes,
And they say "I don't like the prizes, I'd rather have the girl".
Alright, you've won Wendy, off you go the pair of you.
Thank you for being a marvellous contestant.
Let's hear it for 'em, shall we?
Put you hands together and give them a big round warm of women -
I mean applause.
I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows
Don't you love the quiz shows?
I know you love the quiz shows
The BBC knows you love the quiz shows
And all the independents know you love the quiz shows
America taught us to love the quiz shows.
I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows
I love the quiz shows, I love the quiz shows