She cooks with lard
Loves hot food bars
A quart of sweet tea
And fried pork skins
Can't get enough
Eat still she's stuffed
Goes to the bathroom
And then she comes back again
She thinks she looks just like Madonna
When she runs her greasy fingers through her bleached blonde hair
Most times she'll place another order
And lordy have mercy on that little bitty chair
She's got a butt bigger than the Beatles
Eating me outta house and home
Her booty size well it outta be illegal
She has a had time sitting on the throne
Hamburgers, hotdogs
Cheese fries and coleslaw
A dozen bear claws
Yum yum yum
Loves sausage links
Hates diet drinks
Takes up both seats in a two-seater car
Her doctor said lay off the bread
But he didn't say nothing bout a Snickers bar
She drinks sweet milk by the gallon
And she'd never eat a salad or a Lean Cuisine
And she'll lay
Spread out on the hammock
After she's done her damage at the Dairy Queen
She's got a butt bigger than the Beatles
Folks make fun cause she's overgrown
Her rumps shaped like a Volkswagen Beetle
She gives new meaning to the words big boned
Bagels and cream cheese
Vaniller ice cream
A tub of whip cream
Yum yum yum
No you won't find her name on the weight loss of fame
Down at Jenny Craig's
When she cleans em out at the Waffle House
They'll bring in more ham and eggs
Ewwwwwwww
She's got a butt bigger than the Beatles
Her favorite food is chocolate Ding Dongs
It's wide enough to play line backer for the Eagles
Dion Sanders better leave her alone
Tried chicken that steak
Or a fat free milk shake
Enough for god's sake
Stop the insanity
Weight Watchers yeah
Weight Watchers yeah
Yeah I watched her weight
I watched it go from 117 and a quarter when I married her
To 317 and a half two and a half years latter
Moooooooo
But I still love ya honey
