1. 1

    Bob Rivers - 96 Beers

  2. 2

    Bob Rivers - Bought It Up

  3. 3

    Bob Rivers - What If God Smoked Cannabis

  4. 4

    Bob Rivers - 12 Days of Layoffs

  5. 5

    Bob Rivers - 12 Pains Of Christmas

  6. 6

    Bob Rivers - 3 Inch Tool

  7. 7

    Bob Rivers - 401k

  8. 8

    Bob Rivers - Acid Rain

  9. 9

    Bob Rivers - ADD

  10. 10

    Bob Rivers - American Pie Eulogy

  11. 11

    Bob Rivers - Are They Gonna Fry OJ?

  12. 12

    Bob Rivers - Back In a Us Made Car

  13. 13

    Bob Rivers - Beat Up Old Jetliner

  14. 14

    Bob Rivers - Bowel Moves

  15. 15

    Bob Rivers - Californians Leavin

  16. 16

    Bob Rivers - Cheney's Got a Gun

  17. 17

    Bob Rivers - Chipmunks Roasting On An Open Fire

  18. 18

    Bob Rivers - Clean The Cat Box

  19. 19

    Bob Rivers - Denny Way

  20. 20

    Bob Rivers - Dirty Deeds Done With Sheep

  21. 21

    Bob Rivers - Don't Shoot Mr. Postman

  22. 22

    Bob Rivers - Don't Shoot Mr. Postman

  23. 23

    Bob Rivers - Don't Vote For Nader

  24. 24

    Bob Rivers - Gates Is Such a Rich Man

  25. 25

    Bob Rivers - George Bush Told Lies

  26. 26

    Bob Rivers - Getting Fatter All The Time

  27. 27

    Bob Rivers - Have Yourself An Ozzy Little Christmas

  28. 28

    Bob Rivers - Hello I Love You Let's Get Tested For AIDS

  29. 29

    Bob Rivers - Hey You! Get Off My House

  30. 30

    Bob Rivers - How It Feels (To Be Old)

  31. 31

    Bob Rivers - I Am Santa Claus (Black Sabbath Cover)

  32. 32

    Bob Rivers - I Used To Rock And Roll All Night

  33. 33

    Bob Rivers - I'm A Weight Watcher

  34. 34

    Bob Rivers - I'm Santa Claus

  35. 35

    Bob Rivers - Janet's Coconut

  36. 36

    Bob Rivers - Marv Bites

  37. 37

    Bob Rivers - Most Caffeine You've Ever Seen

  38. 38

    Bob Rivers - Mr. Magoo

  39. 39

    Bob Rivers - O.J.'s Trial Thing

  40. 40

    Bob Rivers - Officer Fuhrman

  41. 41

    Bob Rivers - Oxycontin Eater

  42. 42

    Bob Rivers - PMS

  43. 43

    Bob Rivers - Police Stop My Car

  44. 44

    Bob Rivers - Read It In The Tabloids

  45. 45

    Bob Rivers - The 12 Pains of Christmas

  46. 46

    Bob Rivers - The Ballad Of Gary Condit

  47. 47

    Bob Rivers - The Chimney Song

  48. 48

    Bob Rivers - The Handicap Can

  49. 49

    Bob Rivers - The No Smoking Song

  50. 50

    Bob Rivers - Vatican Man

  51. 51

    Bob Rivers - Walking Around In Womens Underwear

  52. 52

    Bob Rivers - When A Man Loves A Chicken

  53. 53

    Bob Rivers - White Trash Christmas

  54. 54

    Bob Rivers - Wrong Foot Amputated

  55. 55

    Bob Rivers - Yellow Snow! Yellow Snow! Yellow Snow!

Chipmunks Roasting On An Open Fire

Bob Rivers

Chipmunks roasting on an open fire
Hot sauce dripping from their toes
(?Oh! That tickles!?)
Yuletide squirrels fresh filleted by the choir
They poked hot skewers through their nose
(?Ow! Wrong end, ya cowboy!?)
Everybody knows some pepper and a garlic clove
Help to make them seasoned right
Tiny rats with a crisp golden coat
Will really hit the spot tonight

And now when Santa sees his tray
(?Ho ho ho ho ho ho?)
There?ll be some homemade chipmunk jerky for his sleigh
(?Mmmm?Hey, look at that!?)
And every hungry child is gonna spy
To see if chipmunks really sing when they fry
And so I?m brushing on some honey glaze
To keep them crisp and juicy too
Let?s hope they get served many times many ways
Tasty Chipmunks; good food

?On that, Mr. Cole, ?
?Yes, sir, Mr. Seville??
?Would you mind handing me the barbeque sauce? I am starved!?
?Oh,no problem Dave. Hey listen, you best be havin? two of those drumsticks, because they?re oh-so tiny and there ain?t much meat upon ?em?
(?What about animal rights, Dave??)
?Put a sock in it Melvin?
?You know, for years people said you over-rated hamsters were my meal ticket. Now I guess you could just say you?re my meal!?
?That?s a good one, Dave?I always knew you was the funny one in the group!?
?Damn straight!?

And so I'm offering some recipes
From chipmunk pie to chipmunk stew
I?m not really sad that it ended this way
Furry chipmunks screw you

?Did you hear that Melvin? Melvin? Mellllviiiiin?"
?Why, I?m sorry Dave, did you want Melvin? There?s plenty of Thagadore left though??

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