- 1
Tism - Abscess Makes The Heart Grow Fonder
- 2
Tism - Doug Parkinson Sings Christie Allen
- 3
Tism - (i'm Gonna Sit Right Down And) Whittle Away My Fur
- 4
Tism - 40 Years - Then Death
- 5
Tism - A Faceful Of Divertimenti
- 6
Tism - Aussiemandias
- 7
Tism - Been Caught Wankin'
- 8
Tism - Death Death Death Amway Amway Amway
- 9
Tism - Eckermann Is Very Silly
- 10
Tism - Everyone Else Has Had More Sex Than Me
- 11
Tism - Father And Son
- 12
Tism - Get Thee To A Nunnery
- 13
Tism - Gotta Root Out Of It
- 14
Tism - Greg! The Stop Sign!
- 15
Tism - I Might Be A Cunt, But I'm Not A Fucking Cunt
- 16
Tism - I Shit Me
- 17
Tism - I'm Interested In Apathy
- 18
Tism - I'm Into Led Zep
- 19
Tism - If You Want The Toilet, You're In It
- 20
Tism - Jung Talent Time
- 21
Tism - Kill Yourself Now And Avoid The Rush
- 22
Tism - Mourningtown Ride
- 23
Tism - Mr. Ches Baragwanath - State Auditor General
- 24
Tism - My Generation
- 25
Tism - Nick Cave And Jim Morrison Play Kick To Kick
- 26
Tism - Professor Derrida Deconstructs
- 27
Tism - Ron Hitler Barassi Talks About How He Does It
- 28
Tism - Russia
- 29
Tism - Saturday Night Palsy
- 30
Tism - Teenage Fucking Jesus
- 31
Tism - The Ballad Of John Bonham's Coke Roadie
- 32
Tism - The Law Of Repulsion After Orgasm
- 33
Tism - The Love You Take Equals The Love You Make So Baby
- 34
Tism - The Men's Room
- 35
Tism - The Mordialloc Road Duplicator
- 36
Tism - The Mystery Of The Artist Explained
- 37
Tism - The Tism Boat Hire Offer
- 38
Tism - Whinge Rock
- 39
Tism - (he'll Never Be An) 'ol Man River
- 40
Tism - (i Think I've Got) Mick Jagger Worked Out
- 41
Tism - (there's Gonna Be) Sex Tonite
- 42
Tism - All Homeboys Are Dickheads
- 43
Tism - All Ordinaries Index
- 44
Tism - Anarchy Means Crossing When It Says 'don't Walk'
- 45
Tism - And The Ass Said To The Angel: 'wanna Play Kick To
- 46
Tism - Apology Of The Thai Drug Runner
- 47
Tism - Australia - The World's Suburb
- 48
Tism - Babies Bite Back
- 49
Tism - Backstage With Ron Hitler
- 50
Tism - Bash This Up Your Ginger
- 51
Tism - Bfw
- 52
Tism - Bishop = Handjob
- 53
Tism - Boot Party
- 54
Tism - Channel Turd
- 55
Tism - Choose Bad Smack
- 56
Tism - Come Back Dj, Your Record Is Scratched
- 57
Tism - Consumption Tax
- 58
Tism - Dazed And Confucious
- 59
Tism - Defecate On My Face
- 60
Tism - Denial Works For Me
- 61
Tism - Dicktatorship
- 62
Tism - Drop The 'tude
- 63
Tism - Dumb 'n' Base
- 64
Tism - Existentialtism
- 65
Tism - Ezra Pound - Axe King
- 66
Tism - Ezra Pound - Axe King 2
- 67
Tism - Five Yards
- 68
Tism - Fourteen Years In Rowville
- 69
Tism - Fuck 'em, Fuck 'em - The Lot Of 'em
- 70
Tism - Garbage
- 71
Tism - Gas! Gas! An Ecstacy Of Fumbling
- 72
Tism - Get Thee In My Behind, Satan
- 73
Tism - Gimme Gimme Nervous Breakdown
- 74
Tism - Give Up For Australia
- 75
Tism - Go The Knuckle
- 76
Tism - Great Expectorations
- 77
Tism - Hello To All Our New Tism Fans
- 78
Tism - Honk If You Love Fred Durst
- 79
Tism - I Don't Want Tism, I Want A Girlfriend
- 80
Tism - I Drive A Truck
- 81
Tism - I Go Off
- 82
Tism - I'll 'ave Ya
- 83
Tism - If You Ever Hear His Name, Harden Not Your Arterie
- 84
Tism - If You're Creative, Get Stuffed
- 85
Tism - If You're Not Famous At Fourteen, You're Finished
- 86
Tism - If You're Ugly, Forget It
- 87
Tism - In Defense Of Poetry
- 88
Tism - Jack Elliot's Turf Whinge
- 89
Tism - Jesus Pots The White Ball
- 90
Tism - Johnny To B. Or Not To B. Goode
- 91
Tism - Julius Seizure (act Iii, Scene Ii, Verse 73-118)
- 92
Tism - Kate, Fischer Of Men
- 93
Tism - Kevin Borich Expressionism
- 94
Tism - Kevin Borich Expressionism Parts 1,2 And 4
- 95
Tism - Kill Americans
- 96
Tism - Leo's Toltoy
- 97
Tism - Let's Club It To Death
- 98
Tism - Let's Form A Company
- 99
Tism - Life Kills
- 100
Tism - Life Kills 2
- 101
Tism - Lillee Caught Dilly Bowled Milli Vanilli
- 102
Tism - Long Hard Thirst Needs A Big Cold Beer, But I Dr
- 103
Tism - Lose Your Delusion Ii
- 104
Tism - Loser, Losing, Lost
- 105
Tism - Lyric For Jack
- 106
Tism - Martin Scorcese Is Really Quite A Jovial Fellow
- 107
Tism - Michael Hutchence In Hell
- 108
Tism - Michael Jackson's Conveyor Belt
- 109
Tism - Mistah Eliot - He Wanker
- 110
Tism - Morrison Hostel
- 111
Tism - My Brilliant Huntington's Chorea
- 112
Tism - Neighbours - Everybody Loves Good Neighbours
- 113
Tism - Never Mind The Bollocks, Here's The House Of Repre
- 114
Tism - Opposite Day
- 115
Tism - Play Mistral For Me
- 116
Tism - Pus
- 117
Tism - Pus Of The Dead
- 118
Tism - Put Your Dog To Sleep
- 119
Tism - Rebel Without A Paunch
- 120
Tism - Recorded By Triple J, Jan 23 1993, Melbourne Showg
- 121
Tism - Root
- 122
Tism - Schoolies Week
- 123
Tism - Sickie
- 124
Tism - State Schools Are Great Schools
- 125
Tism - Strictly Loungeroom
- 126
Tism - Subliminal Satanic Message
- 127
Tism - Take Your Love
- 128
Tism - Tale Of Two Faeces
- 129
Tism - Ten Points For A Razor Scooter
- 130
Tism - The Art-income Dialectic
- 131
Tism - The Australian Guitar Hero Makes His Last Stand
- 132
Tism - The Back Upon Whic Jezza Jumped
- 133
Tism - The Ballad Of Paul Keating
- 134
Tism - The Ballad Of The Semetic Nazi
- 135
Tism - The Fosters Carpark Boogie
- 136
Tism - The Judeo-christian Ethic
- 137
Tism - The Only Thing Stopping Me From Being Happier Is T
- 138
Tism - The Parable Of Glenn Mcgrath's Haircut
- 139
Tism - The Tism Nightsoil Cart And Horse Blues
- 140
Tism - There's More Men In Children Than Wisdom Knows
- 141
Tism - Thou Shalt Not Britney Spear
- 142
Tism - Thunderbirds Are Coming Out
- 143
Tism - Tism Club Song
- 144
Tism - Untz Untz Untz Untz
- 145
Tism - Volare
- 146
Tism - Watering Systems
- 147
Tism - We Are The Champignons
- 148
Tism - Weddings, Parties, Anything
- 149
Tism - Wham Bam Thank You Imam
- 150
Tism - Whatareya
- 151
Tism - While My Catarrh Gently Weeps
- 152
Tism - Would The Last Person To Leave Please Turn Out The
- 153
Tism - X-treme Sports Can Kiss My Arse
- 154
Tism - Yob
If You're Ugly, Forget It
Tism
Immaculate shoulder?
Do you want to get
Your name on her folder?
Hope may spring eternal
But you should not let it:
Hear the unspoken words -
"If you're ugly, forget it".
Oh, can you see that guy?
No wonder you hate him:
He's captain of the footy -
You, of the debating.
You have the rest of your life
With which to regret it -
Obey the unstated rule:
"If you're ugly, forget it".
There's still one place left
For the desperate try hard -
Become an artist;
Join the avaunt garde.
But even in the ghettos
You're likely to get it -
That unbroken rule:
"If you're ugly, forget it".
And so to suicide
You are finally driven.
You'll ask old St. Peter,
"Can I get into heaven?"
He'll point to your tombstone -
The sentence? You've read it:
The unwritten law -
"If you're ugly, forget it".
The worst bands are the most popular.
Arseholes make the most money.
Insecure twats become famous.
Lunatics embrace religion.
Incompetent people are the loudest.
Stands of principle are the least genuine.
Government funding means people don't like it.
Well read people don't know anything.
The avant garde are deeply conservative.
Saving the world is a waste of resources.
Throw out what's useful and re-cycle your garbage.
Nothing happens to ambulance subscribers.