- 1
Citizen Soldier - Suicide Note
- 2
Citizen Soldier - Face To Face
- 3
Citizen Soldier - Inner Critic
- 4
Citizen Soldier - Sit in Your Shadown
- 5
Citizen Soldier - Life Support
- 6
Citizen Soldier - Let It Burn
- 7
Citizen Soldier - Strong For Somebody Else
- 8
Citizen Soldier - I'm Not Okay
- 9
Citizen Soldier - Would Anyone Care
- 10
Citizen Soldier - Reason To Live
- 11
Citizen Soldier - You Are Enough
- 12
Citizen Soldier - Heavy (feat. SkyDxddy)
- 13
Citizen Soldier - Rock Bottom
- 14
Citizen Soldier - Thank You For Hating Me
- 15
Citizen Soldier - Better Off Broken
- 16
Citizen Soldier - Monster Made Of Memories
- 17
Citizen Soldier - My Own Miracle
- 18
Citizen Soldier - Therapy
- 19
Citizen Soldier - This Is Your Sign
- 20
Citizen Soldier - Devil Inside
- 21
Citizen Soldier - Good Old Days
- 22
Citizen Soldier - Just Be Happy
- 23
Citizen Soldier - Never Ending Nightmare (feat. Kellin Quinn)
- 24
Citizen Soldier - Never Good Enough
- 25
Citizen Soldier - Sacred
- 26
Citizen Soldier - Save Your Story
- 27
Citizen Soldier - The liar
- 28
Citizen Soldier - This Is Not a Phase
- 29
Citizen Soldier - Unsaid
- 30
Citizen Soldier - You Are Not Your Past
- 31
Citizen Soldier - Better Than I Used to Be
- 32
Citizen Soldier - Buried Alive
- 33
Citizen Soldier - Easy's Never Been This Hard
- 34
Citizen Soldier - Figure Me Out
- 35
Citizen Soldier - ICU
- 36
Citizen Soldier - irreplaceable
- 37
Citizen Soldier - Letdown
- 38
Citizen Soldier - Save Me From My Angels
- 39
Citizen Soldier - Say Nothing (feat. LEXX)
- 40
Citizen Soldier - Scarecrow
- 41
Citizen Soldier - Soldier
- 42
Citizen Soldier - Through Hell
- 43
Citizen Soldier - Victim Or Survivor
- 44
Citizen Soldier - Where Were You
- 45
Citizen Soldier - Wish I Could Cry
- 46
Citizen Soldier - Words That Don't Exist
- 47
Citizen Soldier - Afterlife
- 48
Citizen Soldier - Anyone But Me
- 49
Citizen Soldier - Comparison
- 50
Citizen Soldier - Deathbed
- 51
Citizen Soldier - In Pieces
- 52
Citizen Soldier - My Little Secret
- 53
Citizen Soldier - Numb To Everything
- 54
Citizen Soldier - Take Me Down
- 55
Citizen Soldier - Tattoos
- 56
Citizen Soldier - Without You
- 57
Citizen Soldier - 15 Minutes Of Fame
- 58
Citizen Soldier - Always December
- 59
Citizen Soldier - Better Place
- 60
Citizen Soldier - Black Hole Brain
- 61
Citizen Soldier - Broken Like Me
- 62
Citizen Soldier - Empty Cup
- 63
Citizen Soldier - Everyday Hero
- 64
Citizen Soldier - Fever
- 65
Citizen Soldier - Forever Damned
- 66
Citizen Soldier - Found
- 67
Citizen Soldier - Golden Weather
- 68
Citizen Soldier - Good Enough For God
- 69
Citizen Soldier - Gunshot Lullabies
- 70
Citizen Soldier - Hallelujah (I'm Not Dead)
- 71
Citizen Soldier - Hospital Bed
- 72
Citizen Soldier - If I Surrender
- 73
Citizen Soldier - Isolate
- 74
Citizen Soldier - Kill My Memory
- 75
Citizen Soldier - Let Me Let Go
- 76
Citizen Soldier - Limit (feat. Lø Spirit)
- 77
Citizen Soldier - Live Again
- 78
Citizen Soldier - Made By Misery
- 79
Citizen Soldier - Make Hate To Me
- 80
Citizen Soldier - Pandora's Box
- 81
Citizen Soldier - Runaway From Myself
- 82
Citizen Soldier - Say Goodbye
- 83
Citizen Soldier - Screaming In Silence
- 84
Citizen Soldier - Still Breathing
- 85
Citizen Soldier - Still Frame
- 86
Citizen Soldier - Stronger Than My Storm
- 87
Citizen Soldier - Till Death Do Us Part
- 88
Citizen Soldier - Waiting On The Sun
- 89
Citizen Soldier - Wanted
- 90
Citizen Soldier - Weight Of The World
- 91
Citizen Soldier - Who I Am
- 92
Citizen Soldier - Wired for Worthless
- 93
Citizen Soldier - Worst In Me
- 94
Citizen Soldier - Alone With Myself
- 95
Citizen Soldier - Bedroom Ceiling
- 96
Citizen Soldier - Bitter
- 97
Citizen Soldier - Burden
- 98
Citizen Soldier - Cannibal
- 99
Citizen Soldier - Caroline
- 100
Citizen Soldier - Chasing Your Ghost
- 101
Citizen Soldier - Dead-End Life
- 102
Citizen Soldier - Death Of Me
- 103
Citizen Soldier - Different Kind of Animal
- 104
Citizen Soldier - Everybody Hates You
- 105
Citizen Soldier - Fake Friends
- 106
Citizen Soldier - Feels Like a Funeral
- 107
Citizen Soldier - First Blood
- 108
Citizen Soldier - Give Up To Ghosts
- 109
Citizen Soldier - Hand Me Down
- 110
Citizen Soldier - Hope It Haunts You
- 111
Citizen Soldier - I Hate Myself
- 112
Citizen Soldier - If These Scars Could Speak
- 113
Citizen Soldier - Invisible
- 114
Citizen Soldier - Madhouse
- 115
Citizen Soldier - Mess Of Me
- 116
Citizen Soldier - Pretend My Pain Away
- 117
Citizen Soldier - The Cage
- 118
Citizen Soldier - Unbreakable
Better Off Broken
Citizen Soldier
I step in your office
Hear: How was your week?
How do you feel?
It's hard to be honest
All I can think about Is shutting back down
What's wrong with me?
I should be better by now
You tell me be patient
That it'll be worth it
All the suppression, session by session
Pulled to the surface
All of the demons through the years I've bottled up
But I'm exhausted
And the past is too much
I'm not ready, it's too heavy
I'm not ready
Why is healing so hard?
And why does numb feel like my only friend?
'Cause when I swallow my scars
Then I don't have to feel it all again
I'm so tired of tearing the trauma back open
Am I better off, better off broken?
Don't wanna breathe deep
I'm tired of mindful
When even the smallest things in my life
Are making me spiral
I had no say, inherited a hemorrhaged heart
It's so unfair that every day is this hard
I wanna be normal
For so many reasons
Like I'll never have the time that I need for anger and grieving
Basic functioning's becoming such a chore
What would I be like
If they cared a little more?
I'm not ready, it's too heavy
Stop pushing me, just let me be empty
Why is healing so hard?
And why does numb feel like my only friend?
'Cause when I swallow my scars
Then I don't have to feel it all again
I'm so tired of tearing the trauma back open
Am I better off, better off broken?
'Cause fifty minutes every week Is not enough for what I need
To give me evidence
I'll shake my skeletons
I know you say these thoughts are lies
But I don't wanna live this tired
With very little proof
And everything to lose
I'm scared you're getting sick of me
So tell me honestly
Why is healing so hard?
And why does numb feel like my only friend?
'Cause when I swallow my scars
I don't have to feel
Why is healing so hard?
And why does numb feel like my only friend?
'Cause when I swallow my scars
Then I don't have to feel it all again
I'm so tired of tearing the trauma back open
Am I better off, better off broken?
Am I better off broken?
Better off broken?
Am I better off, better off broken?
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