- 1
Citizen Soldier - Suicide Note
- 2
Citizen Soldier - Face To Face
- 3
Citizen Soldier - Would Anyone Care
- 4
Citizen Soldier - I'm Not Okay
- 5
Citizen Soldier - Scarecrow
- 6
Citizen Soldier - Wired for Worthless
- 7
Citizen Soldier - You Are Enough
- 8
Citizen Soldier - Always December
- 9
Citizen Soldier - Buried Alive
- 10
Citizen Soldier - Let It Burn
- 11
Citizen Soldier - My Own Miracle
- 12
Citizen Soldier - Numb To Everything
- 13
Citizen Soldier - Rock Bottom
- 14
Citizen Soldier - Sacred
- 15
Citizen Soldier - Somebody's Proud f You
- 16
Citizen Soldier - Strong For Somebody Else
- 17
Citizen Soldier - Till Death Do Us Part
- 18
Citizen Soldier - 15 Minutes Of Fame
- 19
Citizen Soldier - Devil Inside
- 20
Citizen Soldier - Fake Friends
- 21
Citizen Soldier - I Hate Myself
- 22
Citizen Soldier - If I Surrender
- 23
Citizen Soldier - Isolate
- 24
Citizen Soldier - Only One
- 25
Citizen Soldier - Reason To Live
- 26
Citizen Soldier - Stronger Than My Storm
- 27
Citizen Soldier - Thank You For Hating Me
- 28
Citizen Soldier - Who I Am
- 29
Citizen Soldier - Wish I Could Cry
- 30
Citizen Soldier - Words That Don't Exist
- 31
Citizen Soldier - Anyone But Me
- 32
Citizen Soldier - Bedroom Ceiling
- 33
Citizen Soldier - Better Place
- 34
Citizen Soldier - Bitter
- 35
Citizen Soldier - Black Hole Brain
- 36
Citizen Soldier - Burden
- 37
Citizen Soldier - Caroline
- 38
Citizen Soldier - Comparison
- 39
Citizen Soldier - Dead-End Life
- 40
Citizen Soldier - Death Of Me
- 41
Citizen Soldier - Easy's Never Been This Hard
- 42
Citizen Soldier - Empty Cup
- 43
Citizen Soldier - Found
- 44
Citizen Soldier - Good Enough For God
- 45
Citizen Soldier - Good Old Days
- 46
Citizen Soldier - Inner Critic
- 47
Citizen Soldier - Just Be Happy
- 48
Citizen Soldier - Limit (feat. Lø Spirit)
- 49
Citizen Soldier - Monster Made Of Memories
- 50
Citizen Soldier - My Little Secret
- 51
Citizen Soldier - Never Good Enough
- 52
Citizen Soldier - Pretend My Pain Away
- 53
Citizen Soldier - Resilient
- 54
Citizen Soldier - Still Breathing
- 55
Citizen Soldier - Still Frame
- 56
Citizen Soldier - Tattoos
- 57
Citizen Soldier - Therapy
- 58
Citizen Soldier - Through Hell
- 59
Citizen Soldier - Wanted
- 60
Citizen Soldier - Without You
- 61
Citizen Soldier - You Are Not Your Past
- 62
Citizen Soldier - Afterlife
- 63
Citizen Soldier - Alone With Myself
- 64
Citizen Soldier - Better Off Broken
- 65
Citizen Soldier - Broken Like Me
- 66
Citizen Soldier - Deathbed
- 67
Citizen Soldier - Figure Me Out
- 68
Citizen Soldier - First Blood
- 69
Citizen Soldier - Give Up To Ghosts
- 70
Citizen Soldier - Golden Weather
- 71
Citizen Soldier - Gunshot Lullabies
- 72
Citizen Soldier - Hand Me Down
- 73
Citizen Soldier - Hospital Bed
- 74
Citizen Soldier - In Pieces
- 75
Citizen Soldier - irreplaceable
- 76
Citizen Soldier - Kill My Memory
- 77
Citizen Soldier - Let Me Let Go
- 78
Citizen Soldier - Life Support
- 79
Citizen Soldier - Madhouse
- 80
Citizen Soldier - Mess Of Me
- 81
Citizen Soldier - Never Ending Nightmare (feat. Kellin Quinn)
- 82
Citizen Soldier - Save Your Story
- 83
Citizen Soldier - Sit in Your Shadown
- 84
Citizen Soldier - Take Me Down
- 85
Citizen Soldier - This Is Your Sign
- 86
Citizen Soldier - Too Loud
- 87
Citizen Soldier - Weight Of The World
- 88
Citizen Soldier - Where Were You
- 89
Citizen Soldier - Worst In Me
- 90
Citizen Soldier - Worth It All
- 91
Citizen Soldier - Better Than I Used to Be
- 92
Citizen Soldier - Bulletproof
- 93
Citizen Soldier - Cannibal
- 94
Citizen Soldier - Chasing Your Ghost
- 95
Citizen Soldier - Dead Butterflies
- 96
Citizen Soldier - Different Kind of Animal
- 97
Citizen Soldier - Everybody Hates You
- 98
Citizen Soldier - Everyday Hero
- 99
Citizen Soldier - Feelings Aren’t Forever
- 100
Citizen Soldier - Feels Like a Funeral
- 101
Citizen Soldier - Fever
- 102
Citizen Soldier - Forever Damned
- 103
Citizen Soldier - Hallelujah (I'm Not Dead)
- 104
Citizen Soldier - Heavy (feat. SkyDxddy)
- 105
Citizen Soldier - Hope It Haunts You
- 106
Citizen Soldier - I Believe You
- 107
Citizen Soldier - ICU
- 108
Citizen Soldier - If These Scars Could Speak
- 109
Citizen Soldier - Invisible
- 110
Citizen Soldier - It Doesn't Get Better
- 111
Citizen Soldier - It Ends With Me
- 112
Citizen Soldier - Letdown
- 113
Citizen Soldier - Live Again
- 114
Citizen Soldier - Made By Misery
- 115
Citizen Soldier - Make Hate To Me
- 116
Citizen Soldier - Out of Your Gravity
- 117
Citizen Soldier - Pandora's Box
- 118
Citizen Soldier - Runaway From Myself
- 119
Citizen Soldier - Save Me From My Angels
- 120
Citizen Soldier - Say Goodbye
- 121
Citizen Soldier - Say Nothing (feat. LEXX)
- 122
Citizen Soldier - Screaming In Silence
- 123
Citizen Soldier - Soldier
- 124
Citizen Soldier - The Cage
- 125
Citizen Soldier - The liar
- 126
Citizen Soldier - The Other Side Of Pain
- 127
Citizen Soldier - This Is Not a Phase
- 128
Citizen Soldier - Unbreakable
- 129
Citizen Soldier - Underdog
- 130
Citizen Soldier - Unsaid
- 131
Citizen Soldier - Victim Or Survivor
- 132
Citizen Soldier - Waiting On The Sun
Better Off Broken
Citizen Soldier
I step in your office
Hear: How was your week?
How do you feel?
It's hard to be honest
All I can think about Is shutting back down
What's wrong with me?
I should be better by now
You tell me be patient
That it'll be worth it
All the suppression, session by session
Pulled to the surface
All of the demons through the years I've bottled up
But I'm exhausted
And the past is too much
I'm not ready, it's too heavy
I'm not ready
Why is healing so hard?
And why does numb feel like my only friend?
'Cause when I swallow my scars
Then I don't have to feel it all again
I'm so tired of tearing the trauma back open
Am I better off, better off broken?
Don't wanna breathe deep
I'm tired of mindful
When even the smallest things in my life
Are making me spiral
I had no say, inherited a hemorrhaged heart
It's so unfair that every day is this hard
I wanna be normal
For so many reasons
Like I'll never have the time that I need for anger and grieving
Basic functioning's becoming such a chore
What would I be like
If they cared a little more?
I'm not ready, it's too heavy
Stop pushing me, just let me be empty
Why is healing so hard?
And why does numb feel like my only friend?
'Cause when I swallow my scars
Then I don't have to feel it all again
I'm so tired of tearing the trauma back open
Am I better off, better off broken?
'Cause fifty minutes every week Is not enough for what I need
To give me evidence
I'll shake my skeletons
I know you say these thoughts are lies
But I don't wanna live this tired
With very little proof
And everything to lose
I'm scared you're getting sick of me
So tell me honestly
Why is healing so hard?
And why does numb feel like my only friend?
'Cause when I swallow my scars
I don't have to feel
Why is healing so hard?
And why does numb feel like my only friend?
'Cause when I swallow my scars
Then I don't have to feel it all again
I'm so tired of tearing the trauma back open
Am I better off, better off broken?
Am I better off broken?
Better off broken?
Am I better off, better off broken?
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