1. 1

    MC Lars - Buddhism For Dummies

  2. 2

    MC Lars - The Bonus Track For Japan

  3. 3

    MC Lars - This Gigantic Robot Kills

  4. 4

    MC Lars - (Lord It's Hard To Be Happy When You're Not) Using The Metric System

  5. 5

    MC Lars - Ahab

  6. 6

    MC Lars - Download This Song

  7. 7

    MC Lars - Everyone's a Little Bit Gay

  8. 8

    MC Lars - History's Greatest Assholes

  9. 9

    MC Lars - Judas Priest

  10. 10

    MC Lars - My Rhymes Rhyme

  11. 11

    MC Lars - Paul Is Dead

  12. 12

    MC Lars - Running Trains

  13. 13

    MC Lars - Six Degrees Of Kurt Cobain

  14. 14

    MC Lars - The Séance At Harpers Ferry

  15. 15

    MC Lars - (Rock) The Bells

  16. 16

    MC Lars - 21 Concepts

  17. 17

    MC Lars - 911 Am

  18. 18

    MC Lars - Altered State

  19. 19

    MC Lars - Annabel Lee R.i.p.

  20. 20

    MC Lars - Art Of Darkness

  21. 21

    MC Lars - Atom You're Awesome

  22. 22

    MC Lars - Birth Of A Phish

  23. 23

    MC Lars - Carmen Sandiego Has Really Bad Morals

  24. 24

    MC Lars - Certified

  25. 25

    MC Lars - Child's Play

  26. 26

    MC Lars - Cry Tonight

  27. 27

    MC Lars - Cry Tonight

  28. 28

    MC Lars - Deangelo Vickers

  29. 29

    MC Lars - Do The Bruce Cambell

  30. 30

    MC Lars - Escape From Robot Island (featuring MNP)

  31. 31

    MC Lars - Flow Like Poe

  32. 32

    MC Lars - Francis Bacon Slashed The Canvas

  33. 33

    MC Lars - Gary The Green-nosed Reindeer

  34. 34

    MC Lars - Geeked Out

  35. 35

    MC Lars - Generic Crunk Rap

  36. 36

    MC Lars - Going Back To Brooklyn

  37. 37

    MC Lars - Guinevere

  38. 38

    MC Lars - Guitar Hero Hero

  39. 39

    MC Lars - Hey That's Me

  40. 40

    MC Lars - Hey There Ophelia

  41. 41

    MC Lars - Hipster Girl

  42. 42

    MC Lars - Hot Girls Make Guys do Really Stupid Things

  43. 43

    MC Lars - Hot Topic Is Not Punk Rock

  44. 44

    MC Lars - How To Be An Indie Rapper

  45. 45

    MC Lars - Humphrey the Whale

  46. 46

    MC Lars - Hurricane Fresh

  47. 47

    MC Lars - If I Had A Time Machine, That Would Be Fresh

  48. 48

    MC Lars - iGeneration

  49. 49

    MC Lars - Internet Relationships (Are Not Real Relationships)

  50. 50

    MC Lars - It's a Latin Thing

  51. 51

    MC Lars - It's A Party Y'all

  52. 52

    MC Lars - It's not easy (Being green)

  53. 53

    MC Lars - Kidney Stones For Easter

  54. 54

    MC Lars - Lars Attacks!

  55. 55

    MC Lars - Lenore (I Miss You)

  56. 56

    MC Lars - Lolita

  57. 57

    MC Lars - Make a Friend On 27Th Street

  58. 58

    MC Lars - Make Way for Ducklings

  59. 59

    MC Lars - Male Feminist

  60. 60

    MC Lars - Manifest Destiny

  61. 61

    MC Lars - Mike Russo Cut Your Hair

  62. 62

    MC Lars - Missing White Girl Syndrome

  63. 63

    MC Lars - Mr. Raven

  64. 64

    MC Lars - My Biochemical Romance

  65. 65

    MC Lars - My Rhyme's Rhyme

  66. 66

    MC Lars - Nerdcore Died

  67. 67

    MC Lars - Nerdcore Players

  68. 68

    MC Lars - Oneonta (Eli Porter)

  69. 69

    MC Lars - Paul And Phil Are Friends

  70. 70

    MC Lars - Rapbeth (Foul is Fair)

  71. 71

    MC Lars - Rapgirl

  72. 72

    MC Lars - Reaping Beauty

  73. 73

    MC Lars - Rock Star

  74. 74

    MC Lars - Sarah

  75. 75

    MC Lars - Scientology = WTF?

  76. 76

    MC Lars - Shvensen Fitzlogic

  77. 77

    MC Lars - Signing Emo

  78. 78

    MC Lars - Single And Famous

  79. 79

    MC Lars - Somebody's Watching Me

  80. 80

    MC Lars - Something Wicca This Way Comes

  81. 81

    MC Lars - Space Game

  82. 82

    MC Lars - Stat-60

  83. 83

    MC Lars - Straight Outta Stockholm

  84. 84

    MC Lars - Summer Camp Love (Is So In Tents)

  85. 85

    MC Lars - Super Scope

  86. 86

    MC Lars - That's Cpr

  87. 87

    MC Lars - The Abridged Narrative Of Arthur Gordon Pym Of Nantucket

  88. 88

    MC Lars - The Dialogue

  89. 89

    MC Lars - The Game

  90. 90

    MC Lars - The Giving Tree

  91. 91

    MC Lars - The Gospel Of Hip-hop

  92. 92

    MC Lars - The Lint Song

  93. 93

    MC Lars - The Roommate From Hell

  94. 94

    MC Lars - The TellTale

  95. 95

    MC Lars - True Player For Real

  96. 96

    MC Lars - Twenty-three

  97. 97

    MC Lars - Twenty-Three (2011 Remix)

  98. 98

    MC Lars - UK Vica Versa

  99. 99

    MC Lars - UK Visa Versa

  100. 100

    MC Lars - Venomous Box Jellyfish

  101. 101

    MC Lars - We Fresh

  102. 102

    MC Lars - We Have Arrived

  103. 103

    MC Lars - Where Ya Been Lars?

  104. 104

    MC Lars - White Kids Aren't Hyphy

  105. 105

    MC Lars - Yes I Am an Alien

Signing Emo

MC Lars

Once upon a time, in the city of Los Angeles...
Marty, Marty listen to me. Bring me something the kids will cry for.
Get out there, and get us stoked

Meet Marty, major label A&R scout, forty years old, gut hanginh out.
Red Ferrari, Marty livinh in L.A. bumps another line to get through the day.
Dumped by his girl, he paid for her liposuction,
His friends call him Money in his introduction.
And Marty knows nothing but claims to know it all,
Lose the flat screen TV if he drops the ball.
You're as good as your last hit, find the next big thing.
If he doesn't bring the bling, his cell phone won't ring.
What's the trend, what's new? What's a label scout to do? Office life, Marty 11:32.
The label pres. calls and yells, Sign more emo!
How about screamo? "If it sells, sign Nemo,"
"We're down 2%, and BMG knows,
My Daughter likes Dashboard, so get me one of those!"
He checks AP.net, the Scout and more,
yelling band names to his assistant through the door.
The kids like this, who cares if it's great?
So he signs a band called Hearts that Hate.

"Marty... we've got a hit."

Cry tonight. My hands around your hands.
I won't let you die tonight.
Cry tonight. My heart's in your hands.
I won't let you...

Hearts that Hate, Marty goes to their show, up in the club and here we go.
Marty sees a girl in a Simple Plan shirt with a Senses Fail boy, thatÕll never work.
He finds his label friends in the corner they huddle,
An emo cattle auction, they penetrate the bubble.
They talk about Victory and signing TBS,
Dissing the same bands they just tried to impress.
So the lights go down, the crowd starts to scream,
Hearts that Hate have hit the scene.
Blake on vocals, and lead guitar,
He does a backflip, "Look how different we are!"
They show up at the studio to record it,
A TRL, Billboard Modern Rock hit.
They auto-tune Blake, but he can't tell.
He says, "I've got perfect pitch, damn I sing well."
ProTools, Logic, cut, copy, paste, quantized solos and quantized bass.
Signed, sealed, deliver and sent, across the U.S. and the single went...

Cry tonight. My hands around your hands.
I won't let you die tonight.
Cry tonight. My heart's in your hands.
I won't let you DIE


Momentum builds, but it all caves in.
Industrial comes back, the pres. needs a NIN.
Marty finds a new band called "Fetal Coil"
And Hearts that Hate try to keep their fans loyal.
They re-work their sound for album number two,
As "Machines of Hate," but their career is through.
They break up and work pushing mops and brooms,
Blake gives guitar lessons in his living room.
Blake gives guitar lessons in his living room,
Blake gives guitar lessons in his living room.

Can you teach me track five Mr. Blake
Hey, I wrote that song and it goes like this

Cry tonight. My hands around your hands.
I won't let you die tonight.
My Hearts In Your Hands.
I won't Let you DIE
Cry Tonight (Die)
My Hearts In Your Hands.
I Won't Let You Die
Tonight. (Die)
My Hearts In Your Hands.

I won't let you... Die

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