1. 1

    MC Lars - This Gigantic Robot Kills

  2. 2

    MC Lars - Art Of Darkness

  3. 3

    MC Lars - (Lord It's Hard To Be Happy When You're Not) Using The Metric System

  4. 4

    MC Lars - 911 Am

  5. 5

    MC Lars - Birth Of A Phish

  6. 6

    MC Lars - Carmen Sandiego Has Really Bad Morals

  7. 7

    MC Lars - Everyone's a Little Bit Gay

  8. 8

    MC Lars - Flow Like Poe

  9. 9

    MC Lars - Guitar Hero Hero

  10. 10

    MC Lars - If I Had A Time Machine, That Would Be Fresh

  11. 11

    MC Lars - It's not easy (Being green)

  12. 12

    MC Lars - Lenore (I Miss You)

  13. 13

    MC Lars - Male Feminist

  14. 14

    MC Lars - Manifest Destiny

  15. 15

    MC Lars - My Biochemical Romance

  16. 16

    MC Lars - Running Trains

  17. 17

    MC Lars - Shvensen Fitzlogic

  18. 18

    MC Lars - Signing Emo

  19. 19

    MC Lars - Something Wicca This Way Comes

  20. 20

    MC Lars - Straight Outta Stockholm

  21. 21

    MC Lars - Summer Camp Love (Is So In Tents)

  22. 22

    MC Lars - Super Scope

  23. 23

    MC Lars - The Giving Tree

  24. 24

    MC Lars - We Have Arrived

  25. 25

    MC Lars - Yes I Am an Alien

  26. 26

    MC Lars - (Rock) The Bells

  27. 27

    MC Lars - 21 Concepts

  28. 28

    MC Lars - Ahab

  29. 29

    MC Lars - Altered State

  30. 30

    MC Lars - Annabel Lee R.i.p.

  31. 31

    MC Lars - Atom You're Awesome

  32. 32

    MC Lars - Buddhism For Dummies

  33. 33

    MC Lars - Certified

  34. 34

    MC Lars - Child's Play

  35. 35

    MC Lars - Cry Tonight

  36. 36

    MC Lars - Cry Tonight

  37. 37

    MC Lars - Deangelo Vickers

  38. 38

    MC Lars - Do The Bruce Cambell

  39. 39

    MC Lars - Download This Song

  40. 40

    MC Lars - Escape From Robot Island (featuring MNP)

  41. 41

    MC Lars - Francis Bacon Slashed The Canvas

  42. 42

    MC Lars - Gary The Green-nosed Reindeer

  43. 43

    MC Lars - Geeked Out

  44. 44

    MC Lars - Generic Crunk Rap

  45. 45

    MC Lars - Going Back To Brooklyn

  46. 46

    MC Lars - Guinevere

  47. 47

    MC Lars - Hey That's Me

  48. 48

    MC Lars - Hey There Ophelia

  49. 49

    MC Lars - Hipster Girl

  50. 50

    MC Lars - History's Greatest Assholes

  51. 51

    MC Lars - Hot Girls Make Guys do Really Stupid Things

  52. 52

    MC Lars - Hot Topic Is Not Punk Rock

  53. 53

    MC Lars - How To Be An Indie Rapper

  54. 54

    MC Lars - Humphrey the Whale

  55. 55

    MC Lars - Hurricane Fresh

  56. 56

    MC Lars - iGeneration

  57. 57

    MC Lars - Internet Relationships (Are Not Real Relationships)

  58. 58

    MC Lars - It's a Latin Thing

  59. 59

    MC Lars - It's A Party Y'all

  60. 60

    MC Lars - Judas Priest

  61. 61

    MC Lars - Kidney Stones For Easter

  62. 62

    MC Lars - Lars Attacks!

  63. 63

    MC Lars - Lolita

  64. 64

    MC Lars - Make a Friend On 27Th Street

  65. 65

    MC Lars - Make Way for Ducklings

  66. 66

    MC Lars - Mike Russo Cut Your Hair

  67. 67

    MC Lars - Missing White Girl Syndrome

  68. 68

    MC Lars - Mr. Raven

  69. 69

    MC Lars - My Rhyme's Rhyme

  70. 70

    MC Lars - My Rhymes Rhyme

  71. 71

    MC Lars - Nerdcore Died

  72. 72

    MC Lars - Nerdcore Players

  73. 73

    MC Lars - Oneonta (Eli Porter)

  74. 74

    MC Lars - Paul And Phil Are Friends

  75. 75

    MC Lars - Paul Is Dead

  76. 76

    MC Lars - Rapbeth (Foul is Fair)

  77. 77

    MC Lars - Rapgirl

  78. 78

    MC Lars - Reaping Beauty

  79. 79

    MC Lars - Rock Star

  80. 80

    MC Lars - Sarah

  81. 81

    MC Lars - Scientology = WTF?

  82. 82

    MC Lars - Single And Famous

  83. 83

    MC Lars - Six Degrees Of Kurt Cobain

  84. 84

    MC Lars - Somebody's Watching Me

  85. 85

    MC Lars - Space Game

  86. 86

    MC Lars - Stat-60

  87. 87

    MC Lars - That's Cpr

  88. 88

    MC Lars - The Abridged Narrative Of Arthur Gordon Pym Of Nantucket

  89. 89

    MC Lars - The Bonus Track For Japan

  90. 90

    MC Lars - The Dialogue

  91. 91

    MC Lars - The Game

  92. 92

    MC Lars - The Gospel Of Hip-hop

  93. 93

    MC Lars - The Lint Song

  94. 94

    MC Lars - The Roommate From Hell

  95. 95

    MC Lars - The Séance At Harpers Ferry

  96. 96

    MC Lars - The TellTale

  97. 97

    MC Lars - True Player For Real

  98. 98

    MC Lars - Twenty-three

  99. 99

    MC Lars - Twenty-Three (2011 Remix)

  100. 100

    MC Lars - UK Vica Versa

  101. 101

    MC Lars - UK Visa Versa

  102. 102

    MC Lars - Venomous Box Jellyfish

  103. 103

    MC Lars - We Fresh

  104. 104

    MC Lars - Where Ya Been Lars?

  105. 105

    MC Lars - White Kids Aren't Hyphy

Signing Emo

MC Lars

Once upon a time, in the city of Los Angeles...
Marty, Marty listen to me. Bring me something the kids will cry for.
Get out there, and get us stoked

Meet Marty, major label A&R scout, forty years old, gut hanginh out.
Red Ferrari, Marty livinh in L.A. bumps another line to get through the day.
Dumped by his girl, he paid for her liposuction,
His friends call him Money in his introduction.
And Marty knows nothing but claims to know it all,
Lose the flat screen TV if he drops the ball.
You're as good as your last hit, find the next big thing.
If he doesn't bring the bling, his cell phone won't ring.
What's the trend, what's new? What's a label scout to do? Office life, Marty 11:32.
The label pres. calls and yells, Sign more emo!
How about screamo? "If it sells, sign Nemo,"
"We're down 2%, and BMG knows,
My Daughter likes Dashboard, so get me one of those!"
He checks AP.net, the Scout and more,
yelling band names to his assistant through the door.
The kids like this, who cares if it's great?
So he signs a band called Hearts that Hate.

"Marty... we've got a hit."

Cry tonight. My hands around your hands.
I won't let you die tonight.
Cry tonight. My heart's in your hands.
I won't let you...

Hearts that Hate, Marty goes to their show, up in the club and here we go.
Marty sees a girl in a Simple Plan shirt with a Senses Fail boy, thatÕll never work.
He finds his label friends in the corner they huddle,
An emo cattle auction, they penetrate the bubble.
They talk about Victory and signing TBS,
Dissing the same bands they just tried to impress.
So the lights go down, the crowd starts to scream,
Hearts that Hate have hit the scene.
Blake on vocals, and lead guitar,
He does a backflip, "Look how different we are!"
They show up at the studio to record it,
A TRL, Billboard Modern Rock hit.
They auto-tune Blake, but he can't tell.
He says, "I've got perfect pitch, damn I sing well."
ProTools, Logic, cut, copy, paste, quantized solos and quantized bass.
Signed, sealed, deliver and sent, across the U.S. and the single went...

Cry tonight. My hands around your hands.
I won't let you die tonight.
Cry tonight. My heart's in your hands.
I won't let you DIE


Momentum builds, but it all caves in.
Industrial comes back, the pres. needs a NIN.
Marty finds a new band called "Fetal Coil"
And Hearts that Hate try to keep their fans loyal.
They re-work their sound for album number two,
As "Machines of Hate," but their career is through.
They break up and work pushing mops and brooms,
Blake gives guitar lessons in his living room.
Blake gives guitar lessons in his living room,
Blake gives guitar lessons in his living room.

Can you teach me track five Mr. Blake
Hey, I wrote that song and it goes like this

Cry tonight. My hands around your hands.
I won't let you die tonight.
My Hearts In Your Hands.
I won't Let you DIE
Cry Tonight (Die)
My Hearts In Your Hands.
I Won't Let You Die
Tonight. (Die)
My Hearts In Your Hands.

I won't let you... Die

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