1. 1

    MC Lars - (Lord It's Hard To Be Happy When You're Not) Using The Metric System

  2. 2

    MC Lars - Ahab

  3. 3

    MC Lars - Annabel Lee R.i.p.

  4. 4

    MC Lars - Art Of Darkness

  5. 5

    MC Lars - Download This Song

  6. 6

    MC Lars - Stat-60

  7. 7

    MC Lars - The Séance At Harpers Ferry

  8. 8

    MC Lars - (Rock) The Bells

  9. 9

    MC Lars - 21 Concepts

  10. 10

    MC Lars - 911 Am

  11. 11

    MC Lars - Altered State

  12. 12

    MC Lars - Atom You're Awesome

  13. 13

    MC Lars - Birth Of A Phish

  14. 14

    MC Lars - Buddhism For Dummies

  15. 15

    MC Lars - Carmen Sandiego Has Really Bad Morals

  16. 16

    MC Lars - Certified

  17. 17

    MC Lars - Child's Play

  18. 18

    MC Lars - Cry Tonight

  19. 19

    MC Lars - Cry Tonight

  20. 20

    MC Lars - Deangelo Vickers

  21. 21

    MC Lars - Do The Bruce Cambell

  22. 22

    MC Lars - Escape From Robot Island (featuring MNP)

  23. 23

    MC Lars - Everyone's a Little Bit Gay

  24. 24

    MC Lars - Flow Like Poe

  25. 25

    MC Lars - Francis Bacon Slashed The Canvas

  26. 26

    MC Lars - Gary The Green-nosed Reindeer

  27. 27

    MC Lars - Geeked Out

  28. 28

    MC Lars - Generic Crunk Rap

  29. 29

    MC Lars - Going Back To Brooklyn

  30. 30

    MC Lars - Guinevere

  31. 31

    MC Lars - Guitar Hero Hero

  32. 32

    MC Lars - Hey That's Me

  33. 33

    MC Lars - Hey There Ophelia

  34. 34

    MC Lars - Hipster Girl

  35. 35

    MC Lars - History's Greatest Assholes

  36. 36

    MC Lars - Hot Girls Make Guys do Really Stupid Things

  37. 37

    MC Lars - Hot Topic Is Not Punk Rock

  38. 38

    MC Lars - How To Be An Indie Rapper

  39. 39

    MC Lars - Humphrey the Whale

  40. 40

    MC Lars - Hurricane Fresh

  41. 41

    MC Lars - If I Had A Time Machine, That Would Be Fresh

  42. 42

    MC Lars - iGeneration

  43. 43

    MC Lars - Internet Relationships (Are Not Real Relationships)

  44. 44

    MC Lars - It's a Latin Thing

  45. 45

    MC Lars - It's A Party Y'all

  46. 46

    MC Lars - It's not easy (Being green)

  47. 47

    MC Lars - Judas Priest

  48. 48

    MC Lars - Kidney Stones For Easter

  49. 49

    MC Lars - Lars Attacks!

  50. 50

    MC Lars - Lenore (I Miss You)

  51. 51

    MC Lars - Lolita

  52. 52

    MC Lars - Make a Friend On 27Th Street

  53. 53

    MC Lars - Make Way for Ducklings

  54. 54

    MC Lars - Male Feminist

  55. 55

    MC Lars - Manifest Destiny

  56. 56

    MC Lars - Mike Russo Cut Your Hair

  57. 57

    MC Lars - Missing White Girl Syndrome

  58. 58

    MC Lars - Mr. Raven

  59. 59

    MC Lars - My Biochemical Romance

  60. 60

    MC Lars - My Rhyme's Rhyme

  61. 61

    MC Lars - My Rhymes Rhyme

  62. 62

    MC Lars - Nerdcore Died

  63. 63

    MC Lars - Nerdcore Players

  64. 64

    MC Lars - Oneonta (Eli Porter)

  65. 65

    MC Lars - Paul And Phil Are Friends

  66. 66

    MC Lars - Paul Is Dead

  67. 67

    MC Lars - Rapbeth (Foul is Fair)

  68. 68

    MC Lars - Rapgirl

  69. 69

    MC Lars - Reaping Beauty

  70. 70

    MC Lars - Rock Star

  71. 71

    MC Lars - Running Trains

  72. 72

    MC Lars - Sarah

  73. 73

    MC Lars - Scientology = WTF?

  74. 74

    MC Lars - Shvensen Fitzlogic

  75. 75

    MC Lars - Signing Emo

  76. 76

    MC Lars - Single And Famous

  77. 77

    MC Lars - Six Degrees Of Kurt Cobain

  78. 78

    MC Lars - Somebody's Watching Me

  79. 79

    MC Lars - Something Wicca This Way Comes

  80. 80

    MC Lars - Space Game

  81. 81

    MC Lars - Straight Outta Stockholm

  82. 82

    MC Lars - Summer Camp Love (Is So In Tents)

  83. 83

    MC Lars - Super Scope

  84. 84

    MC Lars - That's Cpr

  85. 85

    MC Lars - The Abridged Narrative Of Arthur Gordon Pym Of Nantucket

  86. 86

    MC Lars - The Bonus Track For Japan

  87. 87

    MC Lars - The Dialogue

  88. 88

    MC Lars - The Game

  89. 89

    MC Lars - The Giving Tree

  90. 90

    MC Lars - The Gospel Of Hip-hop

  91. 91

    MC Lars - The Lint Song

  92. 92

    MC Lars - The Roommate From Hell

  93. 93

    MC Lars - The TellTale

  94. 94

    MC Lars - This Gigantic Robot Kills

  95. 95

    MC Lars - True Player For Real

  96. 96

    MC Lars - Twenty-three

  97. 97

    MC Lars - Twenty-Three (2011 Remix)

  98. 98

    MC Lars - UK Vica Versa

  99. 99

    MC Lars - UK Visa Versa

  100. 100

    MC Lars - Venomous Box Jellyfish

  101. 101

    MC Lars - We Fresh

  102. 102

    MC Lars - We Have Arrived

  103. 103

    MC Lars - Where Ya Been Lars?

  104. 104

    MC Lars - White Kids Aren't Hyphy

  105. 105

    MC Lars - Yes I Am an Alien

Signing Emo

MC Lars

Once upon a time, in the city of Los Angeles...
Marty, Marty listen to me. Bring me something the kids will cry for.
Get out there, and get us stoked

Meet Marty, major label A&R scout, forty years old, gut hanginh out.
Red Ferrari, Marty livinh in L.A. bumps another line to get through the day.
Dumped by his girl, he paid for her liposuction,
His friends call him Money in his introduction.
And Marty knows nothing but claims to know it all,
Lose the flat screen TV if he drops the ball.
You're as good as your last hit, find the next big thing.
If he doesn't bring the bling, his cell phone won't ring.
What's the trend, what's new? What's a label scout to do? Office life, Marty 11:32.
The label pres. calls and yells, Sign more emo!
How about screamo? "If it sells, sign Nemo,"
"We're down 2%, and BMG knows,
My Daughter likes Dashboard, so get me one of those!"
He checks AP.net, the Scout and more,
yelling band names to his assistant through the door.
The kids like this, who cares if it's great?
So he signs a band called Hearts that Hate.

"Marty... we've got a hit."

Cry tonight. My hands around your hands.
I won't let you die tonight.
Cry tonight. My heart's in your hands.
I won't let you...

Hearts that Hate, Marty goes to their show, up in the club and here we go.
Marty sees a girl in a Simple Plan shirt with a Senses Fail boy, thatÕll never work.
He finds his label friends in the corner they huddle,
An emo cattle auction, they penetrate the bubble.
They talk about Victory and signing TBS,
Dissing the same bands they just tried to impress.
So the lights go down, the crowd starts to scream,
Hearts that Hate have hit the scene.
Blake on vocals, and lead guitar,
He does a backflip, "Look how different we are!"
They show up at the studio to record it,
A TRL, Billboard Modern Rock hit.
They auto-tune Blake, but he can't tell.
He says, "I've got perfect pitch, damn I sing well."
ProTools, Logic, cut, copy, paste, quantized solos and quantized bass.
Signed, sealed, deliver and sent, across the U.S. and the single went...

Cry tonight. My hands around your hands.
I won't let you die tonight.
Cry tonight. My heart's in your hands.
I won't let you DIE


Momentum builds, but it all caves in.
Industrial comes back, the pres. needs a NIN.
Marty finds a new band called "Fetal Coil"
And Hearts that Hate try to keep their fans loyal.
They re-work their sound for album number two,
As "Machines of Hate," but their career is through.
They break up and work pushing mops and brooms,
Blake gives guitar lessons in his living room.
Blake gives guitar lessons in his living room,
Blake gives guitar lessons in his living room.

Can you teach me track five Mr. Blake
Hey, I wrote that song and it goes like this

Cry tonight. My hands around your hands.
I won't let you die tonight.
My Hearts In Your Hands.
I won't Let you DIE
Cry Tonight (Die)
My Hearts In Your Hands.
I Won't Let You Die
Tonight. (Die)
My Hearts In Your Hands.

I won't let you... Die

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