- 1
Frank Zappa - Bobby Brown Goes Down
- 2
Frank Zappa - Uncle Remus
- 3
Frank Zappa - Peaches En Regalia
- 4
Frank Zappa - Watermelon In Easter Hay
- 5
Frank Zappa - Bobby Brown
- 6
Frank Zappa - Camarillo Brillo
- 7
Frank Zappa - Broken Hearts Are For Assholes
- 8
Frank Zappa - Cosmik Debris
- 9
Frank Zappa - Willie The Pimp
- 10
Frank Zappa - Apostrophe(')
- 11
Frank Zappa - Joe's Garage
- 12
Frank Zappa - Dancin' Fool
- 13
Frank Zappa - Dinah Moe Humm
- 14
Frank Zappa - Muffin Man
- 15
Frank Zappa - Nanook Rubs It
- 16
Frank Zappa - Andy
- 17
Frank Zappa - City Of Tiny Lites
- 18
Frank Zappa - Yo' Mama
- 19
Frank Zappa - You Are What You Is
- 20
Frank Zappa - Catholic Girls
- 21
Frank Zappa - Don't Eat The Yellow Snow
- 22
Frank Zappa - Sofa #2
- 23
Frank Zappa - Trouble Every Day (in album Does Humor Belong In Music)
- 24
Frank Zappa - Any Way The Wind Blows
- 25
Frank Zappa - Cocaine Decisions
- 26
Frank Zappa - Dirty Love
- 27
Frank Zappa - Father O'Blivion
- 28
Frank Zappa - Florentine Pogen
- 29
Frank Zappa - Jewish Princess
- 30
Frank Zappa - St. Alfonzo's Pancake Breakfast
- 31
Frank Zappa - Take Your Clothes Off When You Dance
- 32
Frank Zappa - The Torture Never Stops
- 33
Frank Zappa - Trouble Every Day
- 34
Frank Zappa - Find Her Finer
- 35
Frank Zappa - Fine Girl
- 36
Frank Zappa - Flakes
- 37
Frank Zappa - I'm So Cute
- 38
Frank Zappa - Inca Roads
- 39
Frank Zappa - Mary Lou
- 40
Frank Zappa - Punky's Whips
- 41
Frank Zappa - San Ber'dino
- 42
Frank Zappa - Stink-Foot
- 43
Frank Zappa - Titties & Beer
- 44
Frank Zappa - Ya Hozna
- 45
Frank Zappa - A Token Of My Extreme
- 46
Frank Zappa - Carolina Hard-Core Ecstasy
- 47
Frank Zappa - Dumb All Over
- 48
Frank Zappa - Easy Meat
- 49
Frank Zappa - Fembot In A Wet T-shirt
- 50
Frank Zappa - Fifty-Fifty
- 51
Frank Zappa - Goblin Girl
- 52
Frank Zappa - Hungry Freaks, Daddy
- 53
Frank Zappa - I Have Been In You
- 54
Frank Zappa - Montana
- 55
Frank Zappa - Mr. Green Genes
- 56
Frank Zappa - Plastic People
- 57
Frank Zappa - Po-Jama People
- 58
Frank Zappa - Son Of Mr. Green Genes
- 59
Frank Zappa - Suicide Chump
- 60
Frank Zappa - The Idiot Bastard Son
- 61
Frank Zappa - The Mud Shark
- 62
Frank Zappa - Why Does It Hurt When I Pee?
- 63
Frank Zappa - You're Probably Wondering Why I'm Here
- 64
Frank Zappa - Zomby Woof
- 65
Frank Zappa - Zoot Allures
- 66
Frank Zappa - 200 Years Old
- 67
Frank Zappa - 5050
- 68
Frank Zappa - Absolutely Free
- 69
Frank Zappa - Baby Please Don't Go (feat. John Lennon)
- 70
Frank Zappa - Baby Snakes
- 71
Frank Zappa - Bamboozled By Love
- 72
Frank Zappa - Be In My Video
- 73
Frank Zappa - Big Leg Emma
- 74
Frank Zappa - Big Swifty
- 75
Frank Zappa - Billy The Mountain
- 76
Frank Zappa - Black Napkins
- 77
Frank Zappa - Briefcase Boogie
- 78
Frank Zappa - Brown Shoes Don't Make It
- 79
Frank Zappa - Can't Afford No Shoes
- 80
Frank Zappa - Carol, You Fool
- 81
Frank Zappa - Charlie's Enormous Mouth
- 82
Frank Zappa - Chunga's Revenge
- 83
Frank Zappa - Church Chat
- 84
Frank Zappa - Cock-Suckers' Ball
- 85
Frank Zappa - Conehead
- 86
Frank Zappa - Crew Slut
- 87
Frank Zappa - Dental Hygeine Dilemma
- 88
Frank Zappa - Directly From My Heart To You
- 89
Frank Zappa - Disco Boy
- 90
Frank Zappa - Do You Like My New Car?
- 91
Frank Zappa - Excentrifugal Forz
- 92
Frank Zappa - Flower Punk
- 93
Frank Zappa - Frank Zappa
- 94
Frank Zappa - Get A Little
- 95
Frank Zappa - Go Cry On Somebody Else's Shoulder
- 96
Frank Zappa - He Used To Cut The Grass
- 97
Frank Zappa - Heavenly Bank Account
- 98
Frank Zappa - Help, I'm a Rock
- 99
Frank Zappa - I Come From Nowhere
- 100
Frank Zappa - I Promise Not To Come In Your Mouth
- 101
Frank Zappa - I'm So Happy I Could Cry
- 102
Frank Zappa - I'm The Slime
- 103
Frank Zappa - Jones Crusher
- 104
Frank Zappa - Little House I Used To Live In
- 105
Frank Zappa - Little Rubber Girl
- 106
Frank Zappa - Love Story
- 107
Frank Zappa - Lucille Has Messed My Mind Up (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 3)
- 108
Frank Zappa - Magic Fingers
- 109
Frank Zappa - Mother People
- 110
Frank Zappa - Ms. Pinky
- 111
Frank Zappa - Mudd Club
- 112
Frank Zappa - My Guitar Wants To Kill Your Mama
- 113
Frank Zappa - My Head?
- 114
Frank Zappa - Planet Of My Dreams
- 115
Frank Zappa - Prologue
- 116
Frank Zappa - Pygmy Twylyte
- 117
Frank Zappa - Rubber Shirt
- 118
Frank Zappa - Sex
- 119
Frank Zappa - Sharleena
- 120
Frank Zappa - Society Pages
- 121
Frank Zappa - Son Of Orange County
- 122
Frank Zappa - Stick It Out
- 123
Frank Zappa - Sy Borg
- 124
Frank Zappa - Teenage Wind
- 125
Frank Zappa - The Jazz Discharge Party Hats
- 126
Frank Zappa - The Madison Panty-Sniffing Festival
- 127
Frank Zappa - Tryin' To Grow A Chin
- 128
Frank Zappa - Valarie
- 129
Frank Zappa - Valley Girl
- 130
Frank Zappa - When The Lie's So Big
- 131
Frank Zappa - Who Are The Brain Police?
- 132
Frank Zappa - Why Don't You Like Me?
- 133
Frank Zappa - Wild Love
- 134
Frank Zappa - Wowie Zowie
- 135
Frank Zappa - You Are What You Is (in album Thing-fish)
- 136
Frank Zappa - You Call That Music?
- 137
Frank Zappa - You Didn't Try To Call Me
- 138
Frank Zappa - 200 Motels Fineale
- 139
Frank Zappa - 9/8 Objects
- 140
Frank Zappa - A Few Moments With Brother A. West
- 141
Frank Zappa - A Game Of Cards
- 142
Frank Zappa - A Little Green Rosetta
- 143
Frank Zappa - A Nun Suit Painted On Some Old Boxes
- 144
Frank Zappa - A Typical Sound Check
- 145
Frank Zappa - Advance Romance
- 146
Frank Zappa - Advance Romance (in album You Can't Do That On Stage Anymore vol 3 )
- 147
Frank Zappa - Agency Man
- 148
Frank Zappa - Ain't Got No Heart
- 149
Frank Zappa - Alley Cat
- 150
Frank Zappa - America Drinks
- 151
Frank Zappa - America Drinks & Goes Home
- 152
Frank Zappa - Amnesia Vivace
- 153
Frank Zappa - Any Downers?
- 154
Frank Zappa - Any Kind Of Pain
- 155
Frank Zappa - Anything
- 156
Frank Zappa - Approximate
- 157
Frank Zappa - Are You Hung Up?
- 158
Frank Zappa - Are You Upset?
- 159
Frank Zappa - Artificial Rhonda
- 160
Frank Zappa - At The Gas Station
- 161
Frank Zappa - Babbette
- 162
Frank Zappa - Baby, Take Your Teeth Out
- 163
Frank Zappa - Bacon Fat
- 164
Frank Zappa - Baked-Bean Boogie
- 165
Frank Zappa - Be-Bop Tango (Of The Old Jazzmen's Church)
- 166
Frank Zappa - Beauty Knows No Pain
- 167
Frank Zappa - Bow Tie Daddy
- 168
Frank Zappa - Brown Moses
- 169
Frank Zappa - Brown Shoes Don't Make It (in album Tinseltown Rebellion)
- 170
Frank Zappa - Bwana Dik
- 171
Frank Zappa - Call Any Vegetable
- 172
Frank Zappa - Call Any Vegetable (in album Just Another Band From L.A.)
- 173
Frank Zappa - Carolina Hard-Core Ecstasy (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 4)
- 174
Frank Zappa - Centerville
- 175
Frank Zappa - Chana In De Bushwop
- 176
Frank Zappa - Charles Ives
- 177
Frank Zappa - Charva
- 178
Frank Zappa - Cheap Thrills
- 179
Frank Zappa - Cheepnis
- 180
Frank Zappa - Chocolate Halvah
- 181
Frank Zappa - City Of Tiny Lites (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 5)
- 182
Frank Zappa - Cletus Awreetus-Awrightus
- 183
Frank Zappa - Clowns On Velvet
- 184
Frank Zappa - Cocaine Decisions (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 3)
- 185
Frank Zappa - Concentration Moon
- 186
Frank Zappa - Cops & Buns
- 187
Frank Zappa - Cruising For Burgers
- 188
Frank Zappa - Cucamonga
- 189
Frank Zappa - Daddy, Daddy, Daddy
- 190
Frank Zappa - Dance Contest
- 191
Frank Zappa - Debra Kadabra
- 192
Frank Zappa - Dental Hygiene Dilemma
- 193
Frank Zappa - Deseri
- 194
Frank Zappa - Dew On The Newts We Got
- 195
Frank Zappa - Dickie's Such An Asshole
- 196
Frank Zappa - Didja Get Any Onya?
- 197
Frank Zappa - Diseases Of The Band
- 198
Frank Zappa - Does This Kind of Life Does This Kind of Life?
- 199
Frank Zappa - Does This Kind Of Life Look Interesting To You?
- 200
Frank Zappa - Dog Breath
- 201
Frank Zappa - Dog Breath, In The Year Of The Plague
- 202
Frank Zappa - Don't You Ever Wash That Thing?
- 203
Frank Zappa - Dong Work For Yuda
- 204
Frank Zappa - Doreen
- 205
Frank Zappa - Doreen (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 5)
- 206
Frank Zappa - Drafted Again
- 207
Frank Zappa - Drop Dead
- 208
Frank Zappa - Drowning Witch
- 209
Frank Zappa - Drowning Witch (in album You Can't do That On Stage Anymore vol 3)
- 210
Frank Zappa - Drums Are Too Noisy
- 211
Frank Zappa - Duke Of Prunes
- 212
Frank Zappa - Dummy Up
- 213
Frank Zappa - Echidna's Arf (Of You)
- 214
Frank Zappa - Eddie, Are You Kidding?
- 215
Frank Zappa - Electric Aunt Jemima
- 216
Frank Zappa - Elvis Has Just Left The Building
- 217
Frank Zappa - Envelops The Bath Tub
- 218
Frank Zappa - Epilogue
- 219
Frank Zappa - Evelyn, A Modified Dog
- 220
Frank Zappa - Flambay
- 221
Frank Zappa - For Calvin (And His Next Two Hitch-Hikers)
- 222
Frank Zappa - For The Young Sophisticate
- 223
Frank Zappa - Fountain Of Love
- 224
Frank Zappa - Frogs With Dirty Little Lips
- 225
Frank Zappa - Fuck Yourself
- 226
Frank Zappa - Galoot Up-Date
- 227
Frank Zappa - Geneva Farewell
- 228
Frank Zappa - German Lunch
- 229
Frank Zappa - God Bless America
- 230
Frank Zappa - Half A Dozen Provocative Squats
- 231
Frank Zappa - Happy Together
- 232
Frank Zappa - Harder Than Your Husband
- 233
Frank Zappa - Harry & Rhonda
- 234
Frank Zappa - Harry-As-A-Boy
- 235
Frank Zappa - Harry, You're A Beast
- 236
Frank Zappa - He's So Gay
- 237
Frank Zappa - Here Lies Love
- 238
Frank Zappa - Holding The Group Back
- 239
Frank Zappa - Holiday In Berlin
- 240
Frank Zappa - Honey, Don't You Want A Man Like Me?
- 241
Frank Zappa - Hordern Intro (Incan Art Vamp)
- 242
Frank Zappa - Hot Plate Heaven At The Green Hotel
- 243
Frank Zappa - Hot Poop
- 244
Frank Zappa - How Could I Be Such A Fool
- 245
Frank Zappa - How Could I Be Such A Fool?
- 246
Frank Zappa - I Ain't Got No Heart
- 247
Frank Zappa - I Ain't Got No Heart (in album Tinseltown Rebellion)
- 248
Frank Zappa - I Don't Even Care
- 249
Frank Zappa - I Don't Wanna Get Drafted
- 250
Frank Zappa - I'm A Band Leader
- 251
Frank Zappa - I'm A Beautiful Guy
- 252
Frank Zappa - I'm Not Satisfied
- 253
Frank Zappa - I'm Stealing The Towels
- 254
Frank Zappa - Ian Underwood Whips It Out
- 255
Frank Zappa - If Only She Woulda
- 256
Frank Zappa - If We'd All Been Living In California...
- 257
Frank Zappa - In France
- 258
Frank Zappa - Intro (The Yellow Shark Album)
- 259
Frank Zappa - Invocation And Ritual Dance Of The Young Pumpkin
- 260
Frank Zappa - It Can't Happen Here
- 261
Frank Zappa - It Just Might Be A One-Shot Deal
- 262
Frank Zappa - Janet's Big Dance Number
- 263
Frank Zappa - JCB & Kansas On The Bus #1
- 264
Frank Zappa - JCB & Kansas On The Bus #2
- 265
Frank Zappa - Jelly Roll Gum Drop
- 266
Frank Zappa - Jesus Thinks You're A Jerk
- 267
Frank Zappa - Jezebel Boy
- 268
Frank Zappa - Johnny Darling
- 269
Frank Zappa - Jumbo Go Away
- 270
Frank Zappa - Just One More Time
- 271
Frank Zappa - Kaiser Rolls
- 272
Frank Zappa - Kangaroos
- 273
Frank Zappa - Keep It Greasey
- 274
Frank Zappa - Keep It Greasy
- 275
Frank Zappa - Kenny's Booger Story
- 276
Frank Zappa - King Kong
- 277
Frank Zappa - Later That Night
- 278
Frank Zappa - Latex Solar Beef
- 279
Frank Zappa - Lemme Take You To The Beach
- 280
Frank Zappa - Let's Make The Water Turn Black
- 281
Frank Zappa - Let's Move To Cleveland
- 282
Frank Zappa - Library Card
- 283
Frank Zappa - Like It Or Not
- 284
Frank Zappa - Little Girl Of Mine
- 285
Frank Zappa - Little Green Scratchy Sweaters & Courturoy Ponce
- 286
Frank Zappa - Little House I Used To Live In (in album Fillmore East )
- 287
Frank Zappa - Little Umbrellas
- 288
Frank Zappa - Lonely Little Girl
- 289
Frank Zappa - Lonesome Cowboy Burt
- 290
Frank Zappa - Lonesome Cowboy Nando
- 291
Frank Zappa - Lonesome Electric Turkey
- 292
Frank Zappa - Lost In A Whirlpool
- 293
Frank Zappa - Louie Louie
- 294
Frank Zappa - Love Of My Life
- 295
Frank Zappa - Lucille Has Messed My Mind Up
- 296
Frank Zappa - Lumpy Gravy I
- 297
Frank Zappa - Magdalena
- 298
Frank Zappa - Man With The Woman Head
- 299
Frank Zappa - Massagio Galore
- 300
Frank Zappa - Master Ringo
Dental Hygeine Dilemma
Frank Zappa
Howard Kaylan (vocals)
Ian Underwood (keyboards, woodwinds)
Aynsley Dunbar (drums)
George Duke (keyboards, trombone)
Martin Lickert (bass)
Ruth Underwood (orchestra drum set)
Jim Pons (vocals)
Bad Concience:
han min noon toon han toon han
Good Concience:
No, Jeff!
Bad Concience:
han toon ran toon ran toon fran min han toon ran toon nan toon fram
Good Concience:
No no no!
Jeff Simmons:
Man! This stuff is great! It's just as if Donovan himself had appeared on my very own TV with words of peace, love, and eternal cosmic wisdom. Leading me. Guiding me. On paths of everlasting pseudo-karmic negligence, in the very midst of my drug-induced nocturnal emission.
Good Concience:
Oh, I am your good conscience, Jeff. I know all. I see all. I am a cosmic love pulse matrix, becoming a technicolor interpositive.
Jeff Simmons:
Hmm? Where'd you buy that incense? It's hip.
Good Concience:
It's the same mysterious exotic oriental fragrance as what the Beatles get off on.
Jeff Simmons:
I thought I recognized it. Mmm, what is that, musk?
Good Concience:
Jeff, I know what's good for you.
Jeff Simmons:
Right. You're heavy.
Good Concience:
Yes Jeff, I am your guiding light. Listen to me. Don't rip off the towels Jeff!
Bad Concience:
Kiss off, you little nitwit.
Jeff Simmons:
Hey man, what's the deal?
Good Concience:
Don't listen to him Jeff, he's no good. He'll make you do bad things!
Jeff Simmons:
You mean, he'll make me sin?
Good Concience:
Yes, Jeff. SIN!
Jeff Simmons:
Wow!
Bad Concience:
Jeff, I'd like to have a word with you. About your soul.
Good Concience:
No, don't listen Jeff.
Bad Concience:
Why are you wasting your life, night after night playing this comedy music?
Jeff Simmons:
You're right, I'm too heavy to be in this group.
Good Concience:
Comedy music.
Bad Concience:
Jeff, your soul!
Jeff Simmons:
In this group, all I ever get to do is play Zappa's comedy music. He eats!
Bad Concience:
Jeff!
Jeff Simmons:
I get so tense.
Bad Concience:
Of course you do my boy.
Jeff Simmons:
The stuff he makes me do is always off the wall.
Bad Concience:
That's why it would be best to leave his stern employ.
Jeff Simmons:
And quit the group!
Bad Concience:
You'll make it big!
Jeff Simmons:
That's right.
Bad Concience:
Of course!
Jeff Simmons:
And then I won't be small!
Ahmet Ertegun used this towel as a bathmat six weeks ago at a rancid motel in Orlando, Florida, with the highest mildew rating of any commercial lodging facility within the territorial limits of the United States, naturally excluding tropical possessions. It's still damp. What an aroma! This is the best I ever got off! What can I say about this elixir? Try it on steaks! Cleans nylons! Small craft warnings! It's made for the home! The office! On fruits!
Bad Concience:
This is the real you, Jeff. Rip off a few more ashtrays. Get rid of some of that inner tension. Quit the comedy group! Get your own group together. Heavy! Like Grand Funk, or Black Sabbath.
Good Concience:
No, Jeff. ??:
[?We're coming]
Good Concience:
Peace. Love.
Bad Concience:
Bollocks.
Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan:
What can I say about this elixir?
Mark Volman:
Jeff has gone out there on that stuff!
Bad Concience:
He should have never have used the elixir and only stuck to the incense. Oh, Atlantis.
Mark Volman:
That was Billy the Mountain, dressed up like Donovan, fading out on the wall-mounted TV screen. Jeff _is_ flipping out. Road fatigue! We've got to get him back to normal before Zappa finds out, and steals it, and makes him do it in the movie.
Bad Concience:
You have a brilliant career ahead of you my boy. Just get out of this group!
Mark Volman:
Howard, that was Studebacher Hoch, dressed up like Jim Pons, giving career guidance to the bass player of a rock-oriented comedy group. Jeff's imagination has gone beyond the fringe of audience comprehension.
Howard Kaylan:
Jeff, Jeff it's me the Phlorescent Leech!
Mark Volman:
Jeff, Jeff it's me, Eddie!
Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan:
Wowwww! What can I say about this elixir?
{note: the following three paragraphs are simultaneous and with wildly} {fluctuating pitch. A turntable with a detachable drive is still a useful} {tool! -cgk}
Mark Volman & Howard Kaylan:
Put it on your steaks, uh, send it overseas, [? ? ? ?], and put it on you surfboard so you won't slip off. Try it on your [? ? ?], and on the, the red balloons, you can blow up all balloons with it. Put it on your... heh. On your pizza. Put it on your shoes, tie your mic with it, and fill up your tires with it.
Use it to clean your swimming pool, sell it to your mother and tell her it's a tie-die kit, you won't even believe what'll happen when you starch your shirt with it, ironing goes easier and your car windows never looked better in your whole life. Ladies and gentlemen, you can inhale it, and it makes your voice three keys higher, and you can't even stand what happens when you put it on your hair, as hair tonic. Heh, heh. And if you ever tried it as a...
Soak your shirts in it, soak your teeth in it. Let it play the piano. Follow it around the block. Wear it instead of jeans. Bathe you puppies with it. Feed it to your ducks. Use it instead of chlorine in your swimming pool. Breathe it. [?] it.
What?
Wowwwwww!
What can I?
Wowwwwww!
What? What can I say about this?
Wowwwwww!
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