- 1
La Dispute - Such Small Hands
- 2
La Dispute - Woman (In Mirror)
- 3
La Dispute - Andria
- 4
La Dispute - King Park
- 5
La Dispute - Why It Scares Me
- 6
La Dispute - I Shaved My Head
- 7
La Dispute - Nobody, Not Even the Rain
- 8
La Dispute - All Our Bruised Bodies And The Whole Heart Shrinks
- 9
La Dispute - Autofiction detail
- 10
La Dispute - No One Was Driving The Car
- 11
La Dispute - Twas The Night Before Christmas
- 12
La Dispute - A Broken Jar
- 13
La Dispute - A Poem
- 14
La Dispute - Fall Down, Never Get Back Up Again
- 15
La Dispute - The Most Beautiful Bitter Fruit
- 16
La Dispute - Bury Your Flames
- 17
La Dispute - Future Wars
- 18
La Dispute - I See Everything
- 19
La Dispute - Man With Hands And Ankles Bound
- 20
La Dispute - Woman (Reading)
- 21
La Dispute - A Letter
- 22
La Dispute - Damaged Goods
- 23
La Dispute - For Mayor in Splitsville
- 24
La Dispute - I Dreamt Of A Room With All My Friends I Could Not Get In
- 25
La Dispute - New Storms For Older Lovers
- 26
La Dispute - One
- 27
La Dispute - Safer in the Forest / Love Song for Poor Michigan
- 28
La Dispute - Said the King To the River
- 29
La Dispute - See You In Vancouver
- 30
La Dispute - Self-Portrait Backwards
- 31
La Dispute - Shall Never Lose It's Power
- 32
La Dispute - Sibling Fistfight at Mom's Fiftieth / The Un-Sound
- 33
La Dispute - Six
- 34
La Dispute - Stay Happy There
- 35
La Dispute - Sunday Morning, At a Funeral
- 36
La Dispute - The Field
- 37
La Dispute - The Last Lost Continent
- 38
La Dispute - Two
- 39
La Dispute - View From Our Bedroom Window
- 40
La Dispute - You And I In Unison
- 41
La Dispute - A
- 42
La Dispute - A Departure
- 43
La Dispute - A Word Of Welcome And Of Warning
- 44
La Dispute - Edit Your Hometown
- 45
La Dispute - Eight
- 46
La Dispute - End Times Sermon
- 47
La Dispute - Four
- 48
La Dispute - Fulton Street I
- 49
La Dispute - Harder Harmonies
- 50
La Dispute - Hudsonville Mi
- 51
La Dispute - In Northern Michigan
- 52
La Dispute - Nine
- 53
La Dispute - Sad Prayers For Guilty Bodies
- 54
La Dispute - Scenes from Highways 1981-2009
- 55
La Dispute - St. Paul Missionary Baptist Church Blues
- 56
La Dispute - Ten
- 57
La Dispute - The Castle Builders
- 58
La Dispute - The Surgeon And The Scientist
- 59
La Dispute - Then Again, Maybe You Were Right
- 60
La Dispute - There You Are (Hiding Place)
- 61
La Dispute - Thirteen
- 62
La Dispute - Three
- 63
La Dispute - Top-Sellers Banquet
- 64
La Dispute - Twelve
- 65
La Dispute - Untitled
- 66
La Dispute - 35
- 67
La Dispute - Anxiety Panorama
- 68
La Dispute - Edward Benz, 27 Times
- 69
La Dispute - Eleven
- 70
La Dispute - Environmental Catastrophe Film
- 71
La Dispute - Extraordinary Dinner Party
- 72
La Dispute - Fairmount
- 73
La Dispute - First Reactions After Falling Through the Ice
- 74
La Dispute - Five
- 75
La Dispute - Footsteps At The Pond
- 76
La Dispute - Fulton Street Ii
- 77
La Dispute - He Is Here, He Is Not Afraid
- 78
La Dispute - How I Feel
- 79
La Dispute - Landlord Calls The Sheriff In
- 80
La Dispute - Last Blues
- 81
La Dispute - Last Blues For Bloody Knuckles
- 82
La Dispute - Objects In Space
- 83
La Dispute - Only Everything Below
- 84
La Dispute - Rhodonite And Grief
- 85
La Dispute - Saturation Diver
- 86
La Dispute - Seven
- 87
La Dispute - Steve
- 88
La Dispute - The Child We Lost
- 89
La Dispute - To Withstand The Force Of Storms
- 90
La Dispute - You Ascendant
A Letter
La Dispute
It's so much easier with someone or something to blame.
I've always struggled at the root of the problem.
Has it been absence or my constant lack of defense?
I've never spent a lot on finding a remedy.
I guess i figured that it hurt for a reason.
I guess that's why i've always turned to writing it down.
Not just in stories, but the letters in between.
And i guess that's why it haunts the pages of everything-
To self-examine.
I think the thing is that i shut off from everything.
From friends and family and my own ambitions.
From having fun.
I just shut off from everything.
Self-defeating? yeah, probably.
But i don't know that i had total control over it.
And i'm not sure it even matters why.
Sometimes things happen and you can't do anything.
Plus, i'm the only one who deals with it anyway.
So if everyone could do me a favor and
Just put their fingers down
I'd-and keep your mouths-
Sorry. i know i seem angry.
I'm not, i…i promise. i just know i did this to me.
And i will deal with it accordingly.
And i don't need opinions from those never a part of it.
Don't need them pointing out my problems, they're mine.
Don't need reminders, i know better than anyone.
And yeah, i know, i should be finding another way.
I know that i should be out seeking a substitute.
But just forgetting never really made sense to me.
So i haven't been.
Do i feel embarrassed about it?
I think you know the answer to that.
I think you'd probably feel a little bit embarrassed for me,
Wouldn't you?
I know i should've moved on ages ago, been happy already,
But it's never been that easy for me.
Or maybe it was me that made it so hard.
I know i've only ever tried a handful of times
To sever this thing torturing me.
It never got me anywhere, with anyone.
No friendship or hobby, no lover's bed worked.
But looking back i maybe never tried hard enough,
And it is my fault.
Maybe i never tried at all
