1. 1

    La Dispute - Such Small Hands

  2. 2

    La Dispute - Woman (In Mirror)

  3. 3

    La Dispute - King Park

  4. 4

    La Dispute - All Our Bruised Bodies And The Whole Heart Shrinks

  5. 5

    La Dispute - The Last Lost Continent

  6. 6

    La Dispute - Andria

  7. 7

    La Dispute - Why It Scares Me

  8. 8

    La Dispute - A Letter

  9. 9

    La Dispute - Bury Your Flames

  10. 10

    La Dispute - I Shaved My Head

  11. 11

    La Dispute - You And I In Unison

  12. 12

    La Dispute - A Broken Jar

  13. 13

    La Dispute - Nobody, Not Even the Rain

  14. 14

    La Dispute - Damaged Goods

  15. 15

    La Dispute - Edward Benz, 27 Times

  16. 16

    La Dispute - Environmental Catastrophe Film

  17. 17

    La Dispute - Fall Down, Never Get Back Up Again

  18. 18

    La Dispute - New Storms For Older Lovers

  19. 19

    La Dispute - Sibling Fistfight at Mom's Fiftieth / The Un-Sound

  20. 20

    La Dispute - You Ascendant

  21. 21

    La Dispute - Autofiction detail

  22. 22

    La Dispute - Fulton Street I

  23. 23

    La Dispute - Harder Harmonies

  24. 24

    La Dispute - How I Feel

  25. 25

    La Dispute - I See Everything

  26. 26

    La Dispute - Man With Hands And Ankles Bound

  27. 27

    La Dispute - Said the King To the River

  28. 28

    La Dispute - St. Paul Missionary Baptist Church Blues

  29. 29

    La Dispute - Woman (Reading)

  30. 30

    La Dispute - A Departure

  31. 31

    La Dispute - Anxiety Panorama

  32. 32

    La Dispute - Eight

  33. 33

    La Dispute - Footsteps At The Pond

  34. 34

    La Dispute - Future Wars

  35. 35

    La Dispute - Last Blues

  36. 36

    La Dispute - Rhodonite And Grief

  37. 37

    La Dispute - Sad Prayers For Guilty Bodies

  38. 38

    La Dispute - Safer in the Forest / Love Song for Poor Michigan

  39. 39

    La Dispute - Saturation Diver

  40. 40

    La Dispute - The Most Beautiful Bitter Fruit

  41. 41

    La Dispute - The Surgeon And The Scientist

  42. 42

    La Dispute - View From Our Bedroom Window

  43. 43

    La Dispute - 35

  44. 44

    La Dispute - A

  45. 45

    La Dispute - A Poem

  46. 46

    La Dispute - A Word Of Welcome And Of Warning

  47. 47

    La Dispute - Edit Your Hometown

  48. 48

    La Dispute - Eleven

  49. 49

    La Dispute - End Times Sermon

  50. 50

    La Dispute - Extraordinary Dinner Party

  51. 51

    La Dispute - Fairmount

  52. 52

    La Dispute - First Reactions After Falling Through the Ice

  53. 53

    La Dispute - Five

  54. 54

    La Dispute - For Mayor in Splitsville

  55. 55

    La Dispute - Four

  56. 56

    La Dispute - Fulton Street Ii

  57. 57

    La Dispute - He Is Here, He Is Not Afraid

  58. 58

    La Dispute - Hudsonville Mi

  59. 59

    La Dispute - I Dreamt Of A Room With All My Friends I Could Not Get In

  60. 60

    La Dispute - In Northern Michigan

  61. 61

    La Dispute - Landlord Calls The Sheriff In

  62. 62

    La Dispute - Last Blues For Bloody Knuckles

  63. 63

    La Dispute - Nine

  64. 64

    La Dispute - No One Was Driving The Car

  65. 65

    La Dispute - Objects In Space

  66. 66

    La Dispute - One

  67. 67

    La Dispute - Only Everything Below

  68. 68

    La Dispute - Scenes from Highways 1981-2009

  69. 69

    La Dispute - See You In Vancouver

  70. 70

    La Dispute - Self-Portrait Backwards

  71. 71

    La Dispute - Seven

  72. 72

    La Dispute - Shall Never Lose It's Power

  73. 73

    La Dispute - Six

  74. 74

    La Dispute - Stay Happy There

  75. 75

    La Dispute - Steve

  76. 76

    La Dispute - Sunday Morning, At a Funeral

  77. 77

    La Dispute - Ten

  78. 78

    La Dispute - The Castle Builders

  79. 79

    La Dispute - The Child We Lost

  80. 80

    La Dispute - The Field

  81. 81

    La Dispute - Then Again, Maybe You Were Right

  82. 82

    La Dispute - There You Are (Hiding Place)

  83. 83

    La Dispute - Thirteen

  84. 84

    La Dispute - Three

  85. 85

    La Dispute - To Withstand The Force Of Storms

  86. 86

    La Dispute - Top-Sellers Banquet

  87. 87

    La Dispute - Twas The Night Before Christmas

  88. 88

    La Dispute - Twelve

  89. 89

    La Dispute - Two

  90. 90

    La Dispute - Untitled

Reach for the handbrake now
Pull it upward
Turn the wheel hard
In Danny's car drifting in the parking lot
Midnight at the church
How we'd float on in snowfall
On ice sheets on the asphalt
In circles turned, enclosing underneath

And in the backseat, you and I
Saw Calvary spinning after in the back of us
Caught you in the glass
Reflected by the streetlights as we passed
I noticed the expressions didn't match

Laughter on the one
Contrasted sadness
The look in your eyes
Against your hands
The ceiling and
Your seatbelt off

Dependent on your strength to anchor you
So forceful was the curve
Sent careening into me first
When Danny sideways crashed into the curb

That's the first thing that came back the day I heard

And we would push a little further every time
Breaking into buildings overnight when we got bored
Bent on cheating death
Turned left on every red
The cars ahead slamming on the brakes

We found purpose in laughing after danger
A curse we shouted out
Shot a gun inside the house once
Leaned over the edge of the rooftop
My belt held in the back
Seven stories up to write my name

You carved Die Young with a pen
In the skin below your neck
To keep your recklessness closer to the chest
A reminder to reject
A perpetual hanging threat
A promise you kept now
True to yourself
To the end
In a sense

I suspect you always felt that way
No exceptions for the time you spent in ours
And in mine
And you drifted far away from us in time
Out of mind
Out of sight

What else is there to say now but goodbye?

And the last time I saw you
After years we spent apart
You came to my apartment just to talk
Dressed in a suit
Said your life had gotten better
Even then I wasn't sure it was the truth

When Danny called to tell me
I didn't know how you had been
About the benchmarks you'd met in your life
The counterweights to tip
Keep equal weight on either side
The anguish of existing unrequested
And the joy to be alive

And I know now the truth
That a lie is one too
That some things unsaid
Really aren't in the end
Chief of my regrets?
When he told me how you'd died
I'm ashamed I felt surprised

By your own hand at night
Fired once and survived
And then somehow again
I saw Calvary behind you in the light
Scattered your reflection in the doctrine
And I almost believed
We would enter in elected when we died
Carried by the you and the I in the TULIP despite how hard we tried
Both our names circled twice
You and I would get ushered triumphant
Into heaven and the light

And you reached to find the brake
Nothing there to pull
To be pulled back with grace
From the way you chose to bring yourself relief
Backwards
Forwards
On the ice
Circles spinning helpless at the edge
There again
You and I

What else is there to say now but goodbye?

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