1. 1

    La Dispute - Such Small Hands

  2. 2

    La Dispute - King Park

  3. 3

    La Dispute - Woman (In Mirror)

  4. 4

    La Dispute - Andria

  5. 5

    La Dispute - All Our Bruised Bodies And The Whole Heart Shrinks

  6. 6

    La Dispute - Nobody, Not Even the Rain

  7. 7

    La Dispute - A Letter

  8. 8

    La Dispute - You And I In Unison

  9. 9

    La Dispute - I See Everything

  10. 10

    La Dispute - The Most Beautiful Bitter Fruit

  11. 11

    La Dispute - Bury Your Flames

  12. 12

    La Dispute - Damaged Goods

  13. 13

    La Dispute - Nine

  14. 14

    La Dispute - St. Paul Missionary Baptist Church Blues

  15. 15

    La Dispute - A Broken Jar

  16. 16

    La Dispute - A Departure

  17. 17

    La Dispute - Edit Your Hometown

  18. 18

    La Dispute - Edward Benz, 27 Times

  19. 19

    La Dispute - Fall Down, Never Get Back Up Again

  20. 20

    La Dispute - For Mayor in Splitsville

  21. 21

    La Dispute - Harder Harmonies

  22. 22

    La Dispute - New Storms For Older Lovers

  23. 23

    La Dispute - Said the King To the River

  24. 24

    La Dispute - See You In Vancouver

  25. 25

    La Dispute - The Last Lost Continent

  26. 26

    La Dispute - View From Our Bedroom Window

  27. 27

    La Dispute - Why It Scares Me

  28. 28

    La Dispute - Woman (Reading)

  29. 29

    La Dispute - 35

  30. 30

    La Dispute - A Poem

  31. 31

    La Dispute - Environmental Catastrophe Film

  32. 32

    La Dispute - Fairmount

  33. 33

    La Dispute - First Reactions After Falling Through the Ice

  34. 34

    La Dispute - Five

  35. 35

    La Dispute - Footsteps At The Pond

  36. 36

    La Dispute - Fulton Street I

  37. 37

    La Dispute - Future Wars

  38. 38

    La Dispute - He Is Here, He Is Not Afraid

  39. 39

    La Dispute - How I Feel

  40. 40

    La Dispute - Objects In Space

  41. 41

    La Dispute - Safer in the Forest / Love Song for Poor Michigan

  42. 42

    La Dispute - Shall Never Lose It's Power

  43. 43

    La Dispute - Sibling Fistfight at Mom's Fiftieth / The Un-Sound

  44. 44

    La Dispute - Stay Happy There

  45. 45

    La Dispute - Steve

  46. 46

    La Dispute - Ten

  47. 47

    La Dispute - There You Are (Hiding Place)

  48. 48

    La Dispute - Top-Sellers Banquet

  49. 49

    La Dispute - Twas The Night Before Christmas

  50. 50

    La Dispute - Two

  51. 51

    La Dispute - You Ascendant

  52. 52

    La Dispute - A

  53. 53

    La Dispute - A Word Of Welcome And Of Warning

  54. 54

    La Dispute - Anxiety Panorama

  55. 55

    La Dispute - Autofiction detail

  56. 56

    La Dispute - Eight

  57. 57

    La Dispute - Eleven

  58. 58

    La Dispute - End Times Sermon

  59. 59

    La Dispute - Extraordinary Dinner Party

  60. 60

    La Dispute - Four

  61. 61

    La Dispute - Fulton Street Ii

  62. 62

    La Dispute - Hudsonville Mi

  63. 63

    La Dispute - I Dreamt Of A Room With All My Friends I Could Not Get In

  64. 64

    La Dispute - I Shaved My Head

  65. 65

    La Dispute - In Northern Michigan

  66. 66

    La Dispute - Landlord Calls The Sheriff In

  67. 67

    La Dispute - Last Blues

  68. 68

    La Dispute - Last Blues For Bloody Knuckles

  69. 69

    La Dispute - Man With Hands And Ankles Bound

  70. 70

    La Dispute - No One Was Driving The Car

  71. 71

    La Dispute - One

  72. 72

    La Dispute - Only Everything Below

  73. 73

    La Dispute - Rhodonite And Grief

  74. 74

    La Dispute - Sad Prayers For Guilty Bodies

  75. 75

    La Dispute - Saturation Diver

  76. 76

    La Dispute - Scenes from Highways 1981-2009

  77. 77

    La Dispute - Self-Portrait Backwards

  78. 78

    La Dispute - Seven

  79. 79

    La Dispute - Six

  80. 80

    La Dispute - Sunday Morning, At a Funeral

  81. 81

    La Dispute - The Castle Builders

  82. 82

    La Dispute - The Child We Lost

  83. 83

    La Dispute - The Field

  84. 84

    La Dispute - The Surgeon And The Scientist

  85. 85

    La Dispute - Then Again, Maybe You Were Right

  86. 86

    La Dispute - Thirteen

  87. 87

    La Dispute - Three

  88. 88

    La Dispute - To Withstand The Force Of Storms

  89. 89

    La Dispute - Twelve

  90. 90

    La Dispute - Untitled

Reach for the handbrake now
Pull it upward
Turn the wheel hard
In Danny's car drifting in the parking lot
Midnight at the church
How we'd float on in snowfall
On ice sheets on the asphalt
In circles turned, enclosing underneath

And in the backseat, you and I
Saw Calvary spinning after in the back of us
Caught you in the glass
Reflected by the streetlights as we passed
I noticed the expressions didn't match

Laughter on the one
Contrasted sadness
The look in your eyes
Against your hands
The ceiling and
Your seatbelt off

Dependent on your strength to anchor you
So forceful was the curve
Sent careening into me first
When Danny sideways crashed into the curb

That's the first thing that came back the day I heard

And we would push a little further every time
Breaking into buildings overnight when we got bored
Bent on cheating death
Turned left on every red
The cars ahead slamming on the brakes

We found purpose in laughing after danger
A curse we shouted out
Shot a gun inside the house once
Leaned over the edge of the rooftop
My belt held in the back
Seven stories up to write my name

You carved Die Young with a pen
In the skin below your neck
To keep your recklessness closer to the chest
A reminder to reject
A perpetual hanging threat
A promise you kept now
True to yourself
To the end
In a sense

I suspect you always felt that way
No exceptions for the time you spent in ours
And in mine
And you drifted far away from us in time
Out of mind
Out of sight

What else is there to say now but goodbye?

And the last time I saw you
After years we spent apart
You came to my apartment just to talk
Dressed in a suit
Said your life had gotten better
Even then I wasn't sure it was the truth

When Danny called to tell me
I didn't know how you had been
About the benchmarks you'd met in your life
The counterweights to tip
Keep equal weight on either side
The anguish of existing unrequested
And the joy to be alive

And I know now the truth
That a lie is one too
That some things unsaid
Really aren't in the end
Chief of my regrets?
When he told me how you'd died
I'm ashamed I felt surprised

By your own hand at night
Fired once and survived
And then somehow again
I saw Calvary behind you in the light
Scattered your reflection in the doctrine
And I almost believed
We would enter in elected when we died
Carried by the you and the I in the TULIP despite how hard we tried
Both our names circled twice
You and I would get ushered triumphant
Into heaven and the light

And you reached to find the brake
Nothing there to pull
To be pulled back with grace
From the way you chose to bring yourself relief
Backwards
Forwards
On the ice
Circles spinning helpless at the edge
There again
You and I

What else is there to say now but goodbye?

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