1. 1

    La Dispute - Such Small Hands

  2. 2

    La Dispute - King Park

  3. 3

    La Dispute - Why It Scares Me

  4. 4

    La Dispute - Andria

  5. 5

    La Dispute - Woman (In Mirror)

  6. 6

    La Dispute - The Most Beautiful Bitter Fruit

  7. 7

    La Dispute - Nobody, Not Even the Rain

  8. 8

    La Dispute - Sibling Fistfight at Mom's Fiftieth / The Un-Sound

  9. 9

    La Dispute - Woman (Reading)

  10. 10

    La Dispute - Damaged Goods

  11. 11

    La Dispute - All Our Bruised Bodies And The Whole Heart Shrinks

  12. 12

    La Dispute - A Letter

  13. 13

    La Dispute - I See Everything

  14. 14

    La Dispute - Landlord Calls The Sheriff In

  15. 15

    La Dispute - Said the King To the River

  16. 16

    La Dispute - Bury Your Flames

  17. 17

    La Dispute - Harder Harmonies

  18. 18

    La Dispute - How I Feel

  19. 19

    La Dispute - I Dreamt Of A Room With All My Friends I Could Not Get In

  20. 20

    La Dispute - New Storms For Older Lovers

  21. 21

    La Dispute - Environmental Catastrophe Film

  22. 22

    La Dispute - I Shaved My Head

  23. 23

    La Dispute - Nine

  24. 24

    La Dispute - Sad Prayers For Guilty Bodies

  25. 25

    La Dispute - The Last Lost Continent

  26. 26

    La Dispute - 35

  27. 27

    La Dispute - A Poem

  28. 28

    La Dispute - Autofiction detail

  29. 29

    La Dispute - Edit Your Hometown

  30. 30

    La Dispute - Fall Down, Never Get Back Up Again

  31. 31

    La Dispute - Man With Hands And Ankles Bound

  32. 32

    La Dispute - Rhodonite And Grief

  33. 33

    La Dispute - St. Paul Missionary Baptist Church Blues

  34. 34

    La Dispute - There You Are (Hiding Place)

  35. 35

    La Dispute - You And I In Unison

  36. 36

    La Dispute - A Word Of Welcome And Of Warning

  37. 37

    La Dispute - Edward Benz, 27 Times

  38. 38

    La Dispute - Fairmount

  39. 39

    La Dispute - Five

  40. 40

    La Dispute - Thirteen

  41. 41

    La Dispute - A Broken Jar

  42. 42

    La Dispute - End Times Sermon

  43. 43

    La Dispute - First Reactions After Falling Through the Ice

  44. 44

    La Dispute - Footsteps At The Pond

  45. 45

    La Dispute - Fulton Street I

  46. 46

    La Dispute - Fulton Street Ii

  47. 47

    La Dispute - Future Wars

  48. 48

    La Dispute - No One Was Driving The Car

  49. 49

    La Dispute - Safer in the Forest / Love Song for Poor Michigan

  50. 50

    La Dispute - See You In Vancouver

  51. 51

    La Dispute - Self-Portrait Backwards

  52. 52

    La Dispute - Shall Never Lose It's Power

  53. 53

    La Dispute - Stay Happy There

  54. 54

    La Dispute - Steve

  55. 55

    La Dispute - The Castle Builders

  56. 56

    La Dispute - The Field

  57. 57

    La Dispute - The Surgeon And The Scientist

  58. 58

    La Dispute - Three

  59. 59

    La Dispute - Top-Sellers Banquet

  60. 60

    La Dispute - View From Our Bedroom Window

  61. 61

    La Dispute - You Ascendant

  62. 62

    La Dispute - A

  63. 63

    La Dispute - A Departure

  64. 64

    La Dispute - Anxiety Panorama

  65. 65

    La Dispute - Eight

  66. 66

    La Dispute - Eleven

  67. 67

    La Dispute - Extraordinary Dinner Party

  68. 68

    La Dispute - For Mayor in Splitsville

  69. 69

    La Dispute - Four

  70. 70

    La Dispute - He Is Here, He Is Not Afraid

  71. 71

    La Dispute - Hudsonville Mi

  72. 72

    La Dispute - In Northern Michigan

  73. 73

    La Dispute - Last Blues

  74. 74

    La Dispute - Last Blues For Bloody Knuckles

  75. 75

    La Dispute - Objects In Space

  76. 76

    La Dispute - One

  77. 77

    La Dispute - Only Everything Below

  78. 78

    La Dispute - Saturation Diver

  79. 79

    La Dispute - Scenes from Highways 1981-2009

  80. 80

    La Dispute - Seven

  81. 81

    La Dispute - Six

  82. 82

    La Dispute - Sunday Morning, At a Funeral

  83. 83

    La Dispute - Ten

  84. 84

    La Dispute - The Child We Lost

  85. 85

    La Dispute - Then Again, Maybe You Were Right

  86. 86

    La Dispute - To Withstand The Force Of Storms

  87. 87

    La Dispute - Twas The Night Before Christmas

  88. 88

    La Dispute - Twelve

  89. 89

    La Dispute - Two

  90. 90

    La Dispute - Untitled

Reach for the handbrake now
Pull it upward
Turn the wheel hard
In Danny's car drifting in the parking lot
Midnight at the church
How we'd float on in snowfall
On ice sheets on the asphalt
In circles turned, enclosing underneath

And in the backseat, you and I
Saw Calvary spinning after in the back of us
Caught you in the glass
Reflected by the streetlights as we passed
I noticed the expressions didn't match

Laughter on the one
Contrasted sadness
The look in your eyes
Against your hands
The ceiling and
Your seatbelt off

Dependent on your strength to anchor you
So forceful was the curve
Sent careening into me first
When Danny sideways crashed into the curb

That's the first thing that came back the day I heard

And we would push a little further every time
Breaking into buildings overnight when we got bored
Bent on cheating death
Turned left on every red
The cars ahead slamming on the brakes

We found purpose in laughing after danger
A curse we shouted out
Shot a gun inside the house once
Leaned over the edge of the rooftop
My belt held in the back
Seven stories up to write my name

You carved Die Young with a pen
In the skin below your neck
To keep your recklessness closer to the chest
A reminder to reject
A perpetual hanging threat
A promise you kept now
True to yourself
To the end
In a sense

I suspect you always felt that way
No exceptions for the time you spent in ours
And in mine
And you drifted far away from us in time
Out of mind
Out of sight

What else is there to say now but goodbye?

And the last time I saw you
After years we spent apart
You came to my apartment just to talk
Dressed in a suit
Said your life had gotten better
Even then I wasn't sure it was the truth

When Danny called to tell me
I didn't know how you had been
About the benchmarks you'd met in your life
The counterweights to tip
Keep equal weight on either side
The anguish of existing unrequested
And the joy to be alive

And I know now the truth
That a lie is one too
That some things unsaid
Really aren't in the end
Chief of my regrets?
When he told me how you'd died
I'm ashamed I felt surprised

By your own hand at night
Fired once and survived
And then somehow again
I saw Calvary behind you in the light
Scattered your reflection in the doctrine
And I almost believed
We would enter in elected when we died
Carried by the you and the I in the TULIP despite how hard we tried
Both our names circled twice
You and I would get ushered triumphant
Into heaven and the light

And you reached to find the brake
Nothing there to pull
To be pulled back with grace
From the way you chose to bring yourself relief
Backwards
Forwards
On the ice
Circles spinning helpless at the edge
There again
You and I

What else is there to say now but goodbye?

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